The Guilt Trip Page #4

boyfriend number two.

- No, honey...

- That's nasty!

It was a trampy year for Mommy.

- Please. Anyway...

- Why are you telling me this?

Your father proposed within,

like, a month, I think.

So I went to the boy and I said,

you know, "I met somebody

and he wants to marry me,"

hoping that he would say,

"Joyce, you cannot do that.

"You cannot marry this guy!"

But he didn't say that.

You know what he actually said?

He said, "You're great."

But he told me to marry your father.

Oh, God.

I was so devastated.

I was so devastated that

I couldn't even see him again.

Well, what happened?

Well...

What happened?

I married your father, we moved,

I got pregnant, and...

When we found out

it was a boy, you know,

I started going through names,

as people do, and...

You want your child to remind you

of someone you love... Loved!

And so...

I named you Andy

after the boy from Florida.

You want more ice cream?

Holy sh*t.

Andy! Please.

Enough with the language, okay?

Did... Did Dad know about this?

Now, that is not something

that you share

with your husband. You know?

Holy sh*t!

What is wrong with you?

That is enough

with the street talk, okay?

Ma, I...

I need you to be honest with me, okay?

Yes, I will.

Is he my father?

No, honey. No, he's not your father.

No, no.

It was two years later when I had you.

His last name is Margolis.

Andy Margolis.

From J&R Advertising.

Isn't it funny how I remember that?

Yeah.

Yeah.

J&R.

Hi. I'm trying to track down someone

who used to work

in your New York office.

Probably many years ago.

The name is Andy, or...

Andrew Margolis?

Hold on, please.

Okay, I see that Andrew Margolis

is in our San Francisco offices.

Okay. Great! How long ago

did he work there?

No, sir. Mr. Margolis

is an Executive V.P.

in our San Francisco office currently.

Really?

Would you like to be connected?

Okay!

Andrew Margolis's office.

Seriously? No sh*t.

Is... Is Andrew in, please?

Mr. Margolis is in Europe

until next Monday.

This is Becky.

Hi, Becky.

I'm a very old friend of Andrew's.

We were in Nam together?

Just backpacking though.

And I thought it would be great

to see him again.

So I guess he finally took the wife

on that trip to Europe

she's always wanted, huh?

Mr. Margolis isn't married, sir.

ls there a specific message

you'd like to leave?

No! No. So he gets back next Monday.

Yes, he does.

- Okay. Thank you.

- You're welcome.

Holy sh*t.

I made eggs just the way you like them,

and I used turkey bacon,

which was on sale,

but I know it's still good.

I'm always concerned

for your health, right?

You know,

I was up all night last night,

because I was thinking

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