
The Boys in the Band
- R
- Year:
- 1970
- 118 min
- 2,008 Views
1
Times have changed
And we've often
Rewound the clock
Since the Puritans
Got a shock
When they landed on
Plymouth Rock
If today any shock
They should try to stem
Instead of landing on
Plymouth Rock
Plymouth Rock
Would land on them
In olden days
A glimpse of stocking
Was looked on
As something shocking
Now heaven knows
Anything goes
Motherfucking son of a bitch!
Good authors too
Who once knew better words
Now only use
Four-letter words
Writing prose
Anything goes
Anything
The world has gone
Mad today
And good's bad today
And black's white today
And day's night today
And most guys today
Are just silly gigolos
So though I'm not
A great romancer
I know that
You're bound to answer
When I propose
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything will do
Just think of those
Shocks you got
From that news you've got
If any brains you've got
So though I'm not
A great romancer
I know that
You're bound to answer
When I propose
Anything goes
Anything goes
Anything goes
And it's more than gold
That's what you got
Oh, oh
Oh
It ain't easy...
It ain't easy, no
It ain't easy...
Shit.
Hello? Hello?
Hello? Merde!
Here you go.
Hello.
What do you recommend
for a catatonic fit
in a parking garage?
Ask your doctor.
Did you just call a minute ago?
Mm. It must have be Harold.
My doctor just canceled.
Can I come over?
You're about
a day and a half early.
I just got in. I don't think
I'm ready for you yet.
Why did the prick cancel?
Oh, a virus or something.
He said he was
just too sick.
Why didn't you tell him
you're sicker than he is?
Okay, come on over.
And bring some ice.
Oh, Michael, don't give me
any responsibility.
At the moment, I can't
cope with anything weightier
than the directions
to your apartment.
Look, if you want a cold martini
when you get over here,
you better cope
with some ice.
I'll cope with some ice.
I thought you said
I was too early.
You heard what I said.
You're too early, and hurry up.
Goodbye-aye-aye.
Seventy-five.
Keep it.
How'd you get in?
The street door was open.
Want a drink?
Nope. Not until
I've had my shower.
I want something
to work out today.
I wanna try to relax
and enjoy something.
I see you managed
to cope with Doubleday.
Or did you meet
a bookmobile on the way?
Ha, ha, ha.
Excuse me.
Are you in a blue funk
because of the doctor?
Christ, no.
I was depressed
long before I got there.
Well, this'll
pick you up.
bought all kinds of goodies:
sandalwood soap...
Oh, I feel better already.
Your very own toothbrush,
because I'm sick to death
of you using mine.
Well, how do you think
I feel?
You've had worse things
in your mouth.
And also for you,
something called Control.
Now, notice.
Nowhere on the label
is it called hair spray.
Just simply Control.
And the words "for men"
all over the goddamn can.
Hm. And it's called
butch assurance.
Still hair spray,
no matter if
they call it "Balls."
It's all on your very own shelf,
which is to be labeled
"Donald's Saturday Night
Douche Kit."
By the way, are you
spending the night?
Nope. I'm driving back.
Why didn't the prick
call you and cancel?
Suppose you'd driven
all this way for nothing?
Why do you keep
calling him a prick?
Whoever heard of an analyst
having a session with a patient
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Citation
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"The Boys in the Band" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 20 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_boys_in_the_band_19837>.