Superfantozzi Page #4

---

- No, no, no...

- Check.

- Excuse me...

- I would give a tap... here.

- Where?

Look, right here.

- How's it doing?

- Pretty well.

Take these keys.

One might fit.

- And if not, I'll bring pliers.

- NO! I prefer...

The keys?

All right. Here they are.

- Now I...

- Ah, how's the finger?

Let me see.

- Well, well.

- Excuse me...

Tell me about it later!

Where are you going, lousy pig?

Do you not know who is inside?

No, who is it?

- Princess, shall we flog him?

- Yes... yes!

20... even 25 lashes!

I deserve them!

No. These days should be of

celebration and joy. I forgive you.

Come on!

The handkerchief!

She was Princess Serbelloni

Mazzanti Viendalmare,

The daughter of the prince,

who at that time had organized

a great tournament to

give her hand in marriage

to a brave Knight who

would defeat every opponent.

Fantozzi fell monstrouly in love.

Devoured completely

by that mad passion,

He stopped sleeping,

He stopped eating

- Ugo, why don't you eat?

- Huh? Leave me alone!

and finally, during nights with

a full moon, he began to howl.

KNOCK IT OFF!

Until, realizing the sheer

impossibility of this love...

he decided to

end his suffering.

Excalabar. Excansoar.

Exquicibut. Excansala.

- Excalibur, you moron!

- Thank you!

Excalibur was the magical,

invincible sword

guarded

by the Lake's Magician.

But... sorry...

but... for me..?

Money? Ah, I understand.

How much? Five?

Well, excuse me for a second.

But, could you turn around?

Because, you know, I don't trust

people and... here, I got the money.

But there is a problem.

I only have a 10-piece...

Alright. There you go.

Give it to me!

Here it is! Here it is!

But, sorry...

What about my change?

Ah, no change. Alright.

Ecubitus!

Trumbulus! Escarmity!

Excalibur, you moron!

Yes... but don't insult me

in front of the sword.

With the magic sword,

I will win the tournament

and the Princess will be mine!

The Red Dragon was the winged

sign of the terrible knight

who was a crowd favorite

and was expected to win.

Here it is! Here it is!

Order of demolition: Bull,

Unicorn, Hydra, Eagle.

And finally

Fantozzi's turn!

It was the symbol of the

catering and BBQ service "Spiedo"

who was Fantozzi's sponsor

for the competition.

You're up next! Come on!

Fantozzi's armor:

A wind vane as a helmet plume,

a horrid viking helmet

with zero peripheral visibility,

a stolen bronze suspender from

the statue of Pepin the Short,

and on his feet,

Molten-lead cast ironing implements.

Fantozzi's armor's

total weight:

432 kilos and 7 and a half ounces.

- What do I do? Do I release?

- Release!

Your turn!

Quick give me the sword.

- What sword? The lance goes first!

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes