Spice World Page #5

could be godmother to the baby.

But you're all my best mates.

I want you all to be godmothers.

It's got to be

a Liverpool supporter.

Hang on. Do godmothers

get stretch marks?

Sorry to interrupt,

it's interview and photo time.

- Do we have to?

- Yes, it's your job.

- I'm so sorry.

- See you later.

Girls, it's publicity

for Saturday's show.

Are you part

of the Spice phenomenon?

No, I'm just nobody.

Excuse me a minute.

So we're on a wide-angled lens?

Running.

And now tonight,

I'll be asking

the big questions.

How are relationships moulded

in this kaleidoscopic world

the Spice Girls inhabit?

Let's find out, shall we?

So do you have

any time for boys?

Boys? Doesn't ring a bell.

I think you should just

be able to wheel them in,

then they're there,

and then that's it.

Really?

And order them like a pizza.

I'll have a deep pan, 6-foot,

green eyes, pair of loafers,

and no socks.

Yeah, no cheese.

But you like boys,

don't you, Geri?

Come on.

Is the Pope a Catholic?

Apparently he is, yes.

Church leaders

have reacted with shock

to reports that the Spice Girls

have cast doubt on the religious

conviction of the Pope.

That's more like it!

A Vatican spokesman said

the pontiff was confused

by the suggestion that

he might not be Catholic.

We asked the Bishop

of Candleford what he thought.

It's a terrible suggestion,

almost blasphemous.

Of course

the Pope's a Catholic!

Otherwise he wouldn't

have become Pope, would he?

What evidence do they have

to support these allegations?

Here we go.

The backlash has started.

When the rabbit

of chaos is pursued

by the ferret of disorder

through the fields of anarchy,

it is time to hang your pants

on the hook of darkness.

Yup.

Whether they're clean or not.

London to Milan

Flight SG 1919

6.30am

Why Milan?

London to Milan

Flight SG 1919

6.30am

A TV special.

Screaming kids. The usual.

London to Milan

Flight SG 1919

6.30am

Are we there yet?

What is this?

No way.

Clifford,

what is going on here?

Stop, stop, stop.

Why are you stop-a?

We didn't agree to have

them dancing with us.

You said it was going to be

tacky, but this IS tacky.

Hey, Bobby Charlton.

Why are they stop-a?

They're stopping because

these clowns suddenly appeared.

Molto, molto good dancer.

Sure, but they should be

on another show, or in a zoo.

Look at his muscles. He's got

ferrets burrowing under there.

I know. I'm sorting it out.

Over here.

You think that's real

down there?

Looks like

a pair of rolled-up socks.

You carry on like this,

I take the girls back.

You take the girls back?

What about the contract?

Contract?

In my bed I've got two teddies,

a rabbit and two dollies.

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