Snatched Page #4

Can I just see that?

I didn't look at the dogs.

Do they look like

rapists to you?

Whatever!

LINDA:
Why don't you just

say, "Thank you, Mom"?

EMILY:
Thank you.

"I'm being raped by a dog."

(WHISTLES)

(BARKING)

(BOTH YELP)

EMILY:
(SHRIEKING)

Oh, my God!

It works.

Wow! Mmm-hmm.

Huh?

Welcome.

Oh, thank you. Um

That's check-in, right?

Welcome.

No, no! Thank you so much.

No. Thank you.

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

This is me.

Thank you.

(LINDA SIGHS)

(CHUCKLES)

Oh, thank you very much.

What's this?

Welcome!

(EXCLAIMS)

(GROANS)

Ma'am!

"Whale" what?

"Welcome."

Oh!

"Welcome."

I'm sorry. Honey!

They're not serving up

whale semen.

I'm so sorry.

I've got it, thank you.

I know, but that was not good.

Okay. And I have you

down for a king.

Oh. Nope,

that's not right.

I was supposed to be a king

but one thing led to

another, and I changed it.

So, it's two queens now.

Are you sure you changed it?

Yeah, I called ahead.

I do see that note here.

Okay, well, can you look

at that note

and make that note happen?

I'm sorry, I cannot.

So I'm just gonna share

a king-size bed

in a romantic locale

with my mother?

You can sleep

head-to-toe.

Like we're 69-ing.

Great.

(CHUCKLES)

I know what that means,

you know. "69-ing."

Really, Mom?

What does it mean?

LINDA:
Don't test me.

(SHUTTER CLICKS)

Hey.

Hi.

You ate lunch without me.

Oh, yeah. Sorry.

And you got a drink.

At 2:
00 p.m.

Mmm-hmm. Sure do.

Hey, honey, you're gonna

break your toes in these.

No, I'm not.

These flip-flops are bad

for your feet.

Okay, all right.

I know.

I'm a grown woman, so I'm fine.

But thank you.

Why are you dressed like Powder?

You look like a beekeeper.

Just get some sun,

is what I'm saying.

The sun is very dangerous.

Mom!

Okay, please.

I just want to fix this.

You put so much on.

I don't want you to get

melanoma in front of my eyes.

Please.

Here. Here.

Mom! (GRUNTING)

(SIGHS) So

I'm just gonna read my magazine.

Oh, that's nice.

I didn't know they had a day

care program at the hotel.

(LAUGHING)

So, I don't get it.

It's gross.

It is gross.

(LAUGHS)

Oh, God!

Have you talked

to your dad lately?

Mmm-mmm. I think he's still

in Florida with Susan.

Let's go out tonight.

What? No, I can't.

Yeah, you and me.

We're going out.

No, no, no.

Why?

Hair, make-up, b*obs.

We're going out.

Come on.

Don't do this.

Emily, I am not going strolling

in Ecuador at night.

You're such

a scaredy-cat.

This is what I'm talking about.

You're gonna miss

this whole trip.

Everything shouldn't be

so scary.

Oh, it damn well should.

Okay, thank you.

Name's Ruth. Traveling with

my best friend, Barb.

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