R.I.P.D. Page #3

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We got a lot to talk about,

but for now,

I'm just gonna step back,

let you soak it in

for a minute.

This moment is

not about me.

This is about you

letting go.

Thank you for

letting me soak it in.

I'll wait for you.

All right.

Do you know

what my funeral was?

Watching a bunch of coyotes

pick my carcass clean

and drag my bones

off into a cave.

A freaking cave, hoss.

Here it comes.

Be careful, now!

Julia? Julia!

I'm here. I don't

know how, but I'm here.

I'm sorry, I don't know you.

Can we just talk?

Can we just...

Please don't touch me.

... go somewhere?

Julia? Hey, Julia!

What's your problem, huh?

You piece of sh*t.

Get out of here.

Just relax.

Get back on the meds, buddy.

Get him out of here!

Get him out of here!

Let me go!

That went well.

I tried to do

something nice for you.

What just happened?

How could

she not know it was me?

To them, you don't look like

you, you don't sound like you.

If you try to tell 'em who you

are, it comes out all garbled up.

The universe,

in its ultimate wisdom,

will not let you

reveal yourself.

It's smarter than us.

That's sick.

Consider it the universe's

witness protection program.

So, what do I look like?

Here.

These are

your IDs.

Some federal. A lot of utilities.

Whatever gets us access.

Really?

An old Chinese guy?

What about you?

Well, I guess you win, Roy.

Let me bring you up to

speed with what's on my plate.

When you ride with me,

you ride with the best.

The pace is lightning,

expectations high.

Things are gonna come at you

fast, they're gonna come hot,

and they're gonna come wet.

Wet?

Learn to drive, bimbo!

You've done this before?

Driving?

You're gonna get your feet

wet with a standard pickup.

Find the suspect

and then test him.

See if he's a Deado.

And then...

Look at the ankles

on that girl.

That's what you're into, ankles?

That's what does it for you?

In my day, women, they

dressed very conservatively.

Mmm. That makes you

way less creepy.

When exactly was your day?

1800s, buddy.

I'm what we used

to call a "lawman. "

Marshal Roicephus Pulsipher.

"Roicephus"?

t was considered a very

sexy name at the time.

It sounds like an STD.

Would you care to drive?

I didn't get a peek

at your wife's ankles.

Not one more word

about her.

Listen, rook.

You better work on getting a little

distance, because you two are over.

You just worry

about yourself, partner.

Whoa.

You ain't my partner, rook.

You're just the ass in the other

seat until I say contrary.

I had a partner.

Greatest man I ever knew.

Right up until

he shot me in the back.

That's what

"partner" will get you.

Tell me about it.

How do you think I got here?

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