Postal Page #3

more candidates to talk to.

But hell of a start, though.

- Absolutely.

Last thing before you go --

I'd like you to sing

the company fight song.

[ up-tempo guitar music plays ]

# it's not a flag,

it's a company #

# a high-flying company #

# and it will cheerfully

work you to death #

# by the time you are old,

the pension is sold #

# and your cube

will be your casket #

# it's a company,

a high-flying company #

# now please get back to work #

[ music stops ]

We'll get back to you.

[ keys clacking ]

I hate this town.

[ Mark Polak's "Peace, Love,

and Harmony" plays ]

# change has begun #

# ah, ah #

# spread the word today #

# ah, ah, ah, ah #

# follow the flower children #

# let them lead the way #

Brothers and sisters...

I am proud

to introduce to you the one.

[ cheers and applause ]

Hold up your energies

for Uncle Dave!

[ cheers and applause ]

Good group, good group.

[ inhales deeply ]

Welcome to the Denomination

of Organic Monotheism.

I congratulate you all on taking

the first step to freedom

by completing

your training program.

Obviously, you've come

to the correct conclusion

that the American dream

is not a dream for you.

WOMAN:
That's right!

In fact...

it is a nightmare...

[ cheers and applause ]

yeah!

...a nightmare that soon

will be engulfed

in the all-encompassing flames

of God's damnation!

Yeah!

Pious people in the house,

say, "oh!"

- Oh!

- Oh! - Oh!

Who loves God?

We do!

- We do! - We do!

[ knock on door ]

RICHARD:
David?

Huh?

Oh, yeah.

Initiation.

I love this part.

No, no, Richie, no, no,

this is...

this is just -- this

is just inner-sanctum stuff,

strictly ritualistic.

Uh, Uncle Dave, uh,

sorry to bother you,

but we've got some rather

important business.

[ grunts ]

The girls --

they need to go.

Oh!

Mm. Okay.

Children, it appears

that Brother Richard here

has to, uh, commingle

our -- our energies.

Sweetie -- sweetie --

Let's go.

Come on, ladies, move.

[ pop! ]

DAVE:
There we go.

WOMAN:
But I want more communion.

- Wa-kah!

Oh, we'll do communion,

I promise.

It's my favorite meal

of the day.

Don't worry about it.

RICHARD:
- That's nice.

Now go.

- Oh, hello.

God bless it.

Ah, Richie, what the f*** is it?

What's the problem?

We're having something

[gasps]

of a cash-flow problem.

What the f***

you talking about, Richie?

Did you see all those recruits

out there today?

It's true.

Membership and donations

are at an all-time high,

and we got more tail running

around here than the --

than the Playboy Mansion,

but it's --

[ farts ]

[ water splashing ]

Yeah? So?

Then what's the problem, Rich?

[ breathing heavily ]

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