Party Bus to Hell Page #3

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get f***ed up,

and then f*** some more.

In that order. You?

I don't know,

maybe meet a girl?

Settle down, have some kids.

I'm kidding.

Everything you said times two.

That's my boy.

Make an a**hole out of you yet.

Does anyone else get any

cell phone service out here?

No, we must be in a dead zone.

Get used to it.

Hey, yo, man.

Anybody seen our bus driver?

She's not back here

or anywhere.

Typical. We should have

taken my dad's chopper.

Have to skydive in.

People have.

Peter, you did not tell me

that was an option.

Yo, don't MOOP.

- Excuse me?

- MOOP. Mess Out of Place.

At Burning Man we leave

nothing behind, it's a rule.

[Alan]

Rules are made to be broken.

Oh, my God!

What the hell are you

yelling about now?

- Peter. Peter?

- Yeah?

Look over there.

It looks like

we hit something.

No, we didn't.

We weren't driving.

- [rattling]

- What are you doing?

Warren, I really have to pee.

Ugh, you don't need my help, okay,

so just pick a spot and squat.

I think you need a key

to get in there.

If we had a gun,

we could shoot it out.

Yeah, only problem is my gun

is inside my luggage,

which is inside

this compartment!

Whoa, a gun?

You brought a gun

to Burning Man?

I don't think they allow

guns at the festival.

Well, better safe

than stupid.

Ugh, I'm so darn pissed. Ugh, if

Warren pisses me off one more time.

Ugh, God.

Hey, guys,

this one's unlocked.

It's stuck.

Oh, what the f***?

Yo, that is not

our bus driver.

[Alan]

Actually, I think it is.

Then who the hell's been

driving us this whole time?

- Good f***ing question.

- Ugh.

[sighs] Sure, just pee

whenever you want.

Oh, God, I don't want

to be here.

Sure,

this is so embarrassing.

Okay, I can do this.

- [growls]

- [screams]

- [screaming]

- [Peter] Everyone!

Back to the bus, now!

[all screaming]

Go!

Oh, hell nah.

You don't know who you fu...

[screaming in distance]

Run little piggies. Run!

Help me!

Do you know how

to drive this thing?

- Not without the keys.

- She must have

taken them with her.

[groaning]

- I wanna go home!

- Get us out of here!

Know how

to hot-wire a bus, doll?

Let's go,

let's go, let's go.

Chill out, man, we're out.

Yeah, bathroom's all yours,

quit rocking the boat.

This is a bus,

and we're not doing it.

[screams]

This can't be happening. I didn't

even want to come on this trip.

It was a pinky dare

by my friends.

They said

I wasn't outgoing enough.

"Oh, Stuart,

you need to live life.

You need to get out more,

be more social." Bullshit!

State-of-the-art transport,

motherfuckers!

Bulletproof glass,

reinforced steel frame,

we're practically

in a f***ing tank.

[mimicking bird call]

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