Paparazzi Page #3

- It says here-

This came out of the U.K., so it must

be true- "Unnamed sources say...

"Laramie chartered

a private jet to Switzerland.

"While there the young star reportedly

underwent a penile enhancement...

surprising his wife with it

on her birthday. "

- Nice, huh?

- You give it a name? "Big Bo"? "The Albatross"?

- Something sexy for the bedroom, to keep it fun.

- I'm going to.

- Bo, can we get you for a lineup in here?

- Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no problem.

- It's nice, how they caught me.

- Yeah.

- Y-You want to show it to me?

- Can't keep anything a secret these days.

You got the work done,

you might as well let people see it.

If it's big like that,

w- why would you want to hide it?

Be nicer to him. Things have changed

around here. Take a look.

Oye.

Amigos.

You got the stuff, huh?

S.

Thank you.

Muchas gracias, amigos. Merci.

Sure, man.

- Pinche americano, est loco.

- Este buey est zafado.

Nice legs.

What time do they open?

Does that usually work

where you come from?

- Yeah, a couple of times.

- Leave!

Now!

- Can you believe that guy?

- I thought he was kind of cute.

Loser.

- And you're considering this?

- All I'm saying is they called.

Those schmucks over at Web Pics are turning

this friggin' business into a trout farm.

Celebrities getting approval over

paparazzi's photos? That's bullshit!

The public wants raw and real,

and that's what we give them.

Let me tell you something,

my friends.

We're the last of the real hunters.

I'll drink to that.

Like those shots you got of Lopez.

Now, they were the sh*t.

- And you are a dog.

- Damn straight. I made bank on 'em too.

I spent three nights

hidin' in that tree.

Ants crawlin' all over my ass.

I picked her off with a thousand mil

from 120 yards out.

It was beautiful.

Yeah. Too bad

it wasn't really Lopez.

Nobody knows that.

Let me tell you something, Kevin.

Don't start sweatin'

the small stuff,okay?

Or you'll get soft, end up like the rest of

those pussies working at the agencies.

Hey, I'm here, ain't I?

Hanging with you and Rex,

who is, by the way, still the king.

Hundred and five thousand dollars

for that shot of Clooney in the woods.

Ohh-hoo.

Yeah, Clooney's been

a real gold mine.

- How'd it go, huh?

- She's a lesbian.

Really?

I'm gonna get

a second opinion.

God, you get

a lot of lesbians.

- Let's go.

- Excuse me.

- Buy you another round?

- Yeah.

Hey, Dan- Dana.

- I guess you can afford it.

- What's that supposed to mean?

You think I wouldn't

recognize the guy...

that siphoned half a million dollars

out of Bo Laramie?

Hey, I saw you

get your ass kicked on TV.

Look,

I'm a photojournalist.

- I was doing my job.

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