Outrageous Fortune Page #3

Why do you ask?

Oh, well, there's just so many

actors who come in here. Please go on.

Well, we're putting

on a little pageant...

and there's a kid in my

class who's very insecure.

You know, the other kids pick on

him and his mother doesn't sew...

and I think it would

give him such a boost...

to have the best darn

costume in the place.

So I thought a professional costumers

would have an incredible pumpkin.

But I can't go more than $50...

because this is coming

out of my own pocket.

I'm really sorry. I don't

think we have a pumpkin.

What about a squash?

We don't have any vegetables as such.

I'm sorry.

Well, this is the

last place on the list.

But I'll just throw something

together myself, huh?

I really appreciate your time. Thanks.

Um, uh, listen. I don't know,

maybe, uh, maybe someone...

Maybe I could, uh... I've

made a lot of my own costumes.

I'm sure it wouldn't be that

difficult. If I could help out, I'd...

like to.

That would be fabulous.

- I hope you'll forgive me, Lauren.

- For what?

L... I don't usually

lunge at women like that.

- Oh.

- But you just, uh...

I just had to kiss you.

L-I really am sorry and I hope

that you'll want to see me again.

Oh, where in the world

did you come from?

- New Mexico, originally.

- No, no, I mean...

how can a man so delightful as you...

be just wandering the

streets of New York?

Single, single, yeah.

I can't believe it.

Well, that's not by choice.

I'd like to be married.

- This isn't happening.

- Why not?

Well, there must be something wrong

with you. Don't you have any faults?

I smoke.

You smoke? That's it? Call the police!

No, no, no. It's an addiction.

Colton's tobacco. New Mexico's finest.

I hope you don't mind.

Well, I'll struggle through somehow.

Good. Very good.

Because, uh, I'd like

to see you again...

tomorrow night.

Well, yes.

Mmm, thank you.

What's this?

"Ooh, eee, ooh, ah, ooh, eee, ah, ooh."

- That's what you do in acting class?

- Those are vowel groups.

Mmm, sorry. "Wowel" groups.

- Ooh. -

Ooh. - Ooh.

- Ooh, I feel the same way.

- Ooh, ooh.

Will you please kiss

me hard on the lips?

That was tender, but tasty.

- Bite my face.

- Okay.

Bite my leg. Now bite my other leg.

- You get her two 1 X legs and...

- Going over the fence gymnastics?

Oh, oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, my. That kind of evening, huh?

Not the kind you're used

to. No money changed hands.

No, no, no, no. Reveal, reveal.

You have killed your father.

You have married your mother.

Na, no words, remember.

Na, reveal.

Here we have a sick sea lion. Go.

- Miss Brozinsky.

- Okay.

You will now perform for

us, also without words...

Hamlet's soliloquy.

Who's that?

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