Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie Page #3

Well, suddenly I have

a refreshing mint flavor.

Early LSD tests in the

Air Force.

This is a job for

Weenie-man!

Eat at Joe's. Eat at Joe's.

Eat at Joe's.

Wow, they're ringing!

Now he knows what the world sounds

like to Pete Townshend.

Into the Weenie-mobile.

Weenie-man away!

I'd like to thank me

for flying me Airways.

- Uh, there's a green switch.

It was there all the time! - D'oh!

G.I. Joe action-set.

Nerdy Joe not included.

- Cal, you okay?

- Okay.

What happened?

How'd you bring it in?

- I didn't. Couldn't.

- I died.

- What do you mean you didn't?

- Controls went out.

- Huh?

- That's right. No controls, no power.

The plane died up there.

- I should be dead.

- Did you bring me a toy?

Cal, I know everybody's

seeing flying saucers

and screwy

lights up in the sky.

Well, you can put me

in the booby hatch too,

because, so help me, I saw this ship

turn a bright green up there.

- Are you sure, Joe?

- Positive.

- Did you hear anything?

- Yes.

A high-frequency howl, very high,

all the time your ship was

- Green?

- Green?

- Did Webb see it?

- Unless he's blind.

- Check him.

- Right.

Oh, and, Joe,

until we find out what happened,

all three of us were blind.

I'll go pop Webb's eyes out.

So, was being green fun?

- Okay, I don't wanna talk about it anymore.

- I was just wondering, I mean...

- I've always wanted to...

- No. Shut up.

- How's the little giant? - Growing up.

Getting ready to astound the world.

Let's take a look.

I figured that.

She's all ready and waiting.

Wow, that's one hell of a

View-Master.

Oh yeah, this is when science

didn't have to have any specific purpose.

Lowering the cylinder.

Inserting the

breakfast pastry.

The secret government Eggo project.

Contact Dr. Jemima.

I love the blueberrie ones best.

- Increase the rate of reaction.

- Start warming the syrup.

Yum.

Check rate of

radioactive decay.

Increase the Flash Gordon noise

and put more science stuff around.

Positive. Same it was

the whole week you were away.

- What did the committee say?

- Oh, they were a little excited.

A little!

Oh my god, my waffle!

Oh, the humanity!

Fries are up!

Oh no,

you're flooding it!

Zero reading.

- The X-C condenser must have shorted

out again. - Get the spare.

- Burned out yesterday!

- Oh, we can't have nice things!

Our liquorice ice cream cones melted!

And don't ask me why I didn't

order some new ones. I did.

X-C condensers in an envelope?

Must be a gag dreamed up

by the receiving department.

I ordered two X-C condensers,

and supreme equipment sent me these beads.

He touched me!

You say they're a gag,

but they're condensers.

I checked one for capacity

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