Monkey Business Page #3

Synopsis: While stowing away on a ship to America, the boys get involuntarily pressed into service as toughs for a pair of feuding gangsters while trying desparately to evade the ship's crew. After arriving stateside, one of the gangsters kidnaps the other's daughter - and it's up to our unlikely heroes to save the day.
Genre: Comedy, Musical
Director(s): Norman Z. McLeod
Production: MCA Universal Home Video
  2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.6
Rotten Tomatoes:
94%
NOT RATED
Year:
1931
77 min
99 Views


[Children cheering]

Get out of my way!

[Children continue laughing and cheering]

[Harpo humming in distorted voice]

[Harpo screams]

Gibson. Come out of there.

Yes, sir.

I want to report I found a...

Gibson, you've been drinking again...

and you know what my orders were.

But those stowaways,

I just caught one of them in there.

- Stowaway, huh?

- Yes. There he is.

PUPPETEER:
[ln falsetto] Help! Look out!

You're choking me!

I thought so. Go to your quarters.

[Children laughing]

That's one now.

That's a dummy. Come with me.

[Children laughing]

First officer.

I'm telling you, that's him.

This has gone far enough.

Get up to your quarters.

[Captain screams]

Yes, sir.

[Children laughing]

Quiet.

I think you're right.

I know you're right.

[Puppeteer shouting indistinctly]

[Harpo whistling upbeat tune]

[Horn tooting]

[Children cheering]

Would you like anything before lunch?

Yes, breakfast.

Nobody eats in here.

I do.

Mustard's no good without roast beef.

Do you want your nails trimmed long?

About an hour and a half.

I got nothing to do.

You're a nice-looking gal, all right.

You got it.

Thank you.

And you can keep it.

[Girl screams]

That's a nice gal?

Somebody's coming.

Come on, boys.

You're next, Cap.

I'm looking for a couple of mugs.

- No, you boys look on B Deck.

- Aye, aye, sir.

How about a shave?

- Sure. Give me a once-over.

- Once-over, partner.

OFFICER:
No, a shave.

CHICO:
On the face. All right.

- Wake me up when you get through.

- We'll take care of you, all right.

We take the tonsils last.

I think we work on the moustache first.

Give him a little snoop.

CHICO:
This side's too long.

Give him a little snoop this side.

CHICO:
Now this side is too short.

CHICO:
It's too short. The other side is

too long. Snoop him up.

That's better, but the side

that was too short now is too long...

and the side that was too long is too short.

I think you got to give him one more snoop.

I think we better measure.

It's about a foot too much.

No, the measure's a foot too much.

Now it looks much better.

CHICO:
It can stand one more snoop

in the middle, I think.

In the middle, one snoop.

That's fine. That's very good.

I think it's a little bit rough right here.

I fix that.

You know, I'm never going

on this boat again. The food is no good.

Of course, I no eat yet, but even

if I don't eat, I like the food good.

One more snoop.

That's beautiful?

That's what you call a work of art.

Hey, you know, I think you give him

one snoop too much.

And I want you to know,

I'm fed up on your alibis.

Take it easy.

You're getting all excited.

Now where do you think you're going?

Never mind. I'm running this racket.

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S.J. Perelman

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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