Marley & Me Page #6

Marley, stop.

Marley, you're incorrigible.

Incorrigible? I don't believe in that word.

Every dog wants to learn.

Hey, come here, baby.

Yes, you're a good girl.

You're a good girl.

Yes, you are.

'Course, they can't learn

if their parents are weak-willed.

Yeah. Well, I'm pretty

strong-willed, but-

- Marley-

- Say hello to Marley.

So which of you is gonna be the trainer?

Well, we both thought we would, 'cause

we'd like him to listen to both of us at home.

- We're married too. Yeah.

- No, no, no, no.

A dog can only have one master.

Which one of you has the most natural

authority in your own relationship?

Well, maybe I'll stand

over there for the beginning.

I thought so. Shall we?

- Geez!

- All right, sit.

Sit. Sit.

Sit. Marley.

Okay. Marley- Marley, sit.

This, class, is a classic example of a dog...

who has foolishly been

allowed to believe...

he is the alpha male of the pack...

and therefore, he can never be a happy animal.

Yeah. He looks pretty miserable.

You, joker, rotate in.

And lose the sunglasses.

Dog likes to be

looked at in the eye.

- Jawohl.

- I got it.

- Okay.

- Okay. You got him?

- Yeah.

- Okay.

So. Collar your dogs.

Good boy.

All right, dogs on the left.

On the count of three.

One, two, three. Let's go.

Very nice. Very good.

Good.

- Hey!

- Correct him!

- Whoa!

- Rein in that dog.

All right. All right, class.

Come on. Let's line up again.

Class, it's a simple question

of having confidence...

in your own authority.

I shall now demonstrate a simple walk.

All right?

Mr. Grogan?

- Sorry.

- May I?

All right, even an unruly dog...

likes to obey his leader.

Marley, heel.

Yeah.

Marley. Marley!

Marley! Marley!

Marley.

Careful. Marley, no!

Marley!

Aaah! That's it. He is out.

Sorry. Usually he does this with poodles.

That dog is a bad influence on the others.

Now, leg humping is like a virus.

Once it takes hold of the group- No.

- Okay.

- He has got to go.

It was maybe your hair.

- Reminded him of a poodle.

- Never bring him back.

Right from the beginning

she had me in her sights.

- I know. She really did.

- Marley wouldn't take any of her crap.

That's why he got kicked out.

You are now the world's worst dog.

You've been kicked out

of obedience school.

You know, there is

something else that we could do.

No, I know. We just-We get a-

No. No, no, no, no, no.

I'm smiling, but I'm serious. No.

It's not gonna be so bad, buddy.

You'll see. Sex is overrated.

Aw, I can't tell you that,

'cause you know it's a lie.

Poor son of a b*tch.

Okay. You wanna come up?

Yeah. That's the least I can do.

- Marley!

- Get a little fresh air.

Oh, gosh. It's like he's

walking the plank.

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