Mancation Page #5

I didn't marry

the boss's daughter.

The very same boss

Who would be

very very very upset

If he thought

his little princess

Was unhappy

in the slightest way.

Yeah, well...

Okay. I think...

i think I'm about done

here for today, so...

- yeah.

- See you on monday, vince.

Sweetums, I'm home!

Oh yeah.

Yeah yeah.

Oh, holy sh*t.

- It's just you.

- Who is it?

- It's just vince.

- Well, keep going.

oh yes.

What the f***?

Look, i don't know

what to tell you, vince.

I'm not in love with you.

I don't even like men,

in general.

- D*cks are gross to me.

- Oh yes.

There, i said it.

Can we not have this conversation

While you're inside

of someone?

I can't believe

this is happening.

Deal with it.

I needed a husband

to keep the trust fund,

And you?

You needed to marry

the boss's daughter

To get ahead

in the company.

Isn't that

all you wanted, vince?

No.

That's news to me.

So... So what then?

That's it.

I called you guys

and came here.

I know. I mean,

but after you found them,

- What'd you do?

- Nothing. I got out of there.

What, seriously? You didn't

even attempt to get in on that?

What kind of hardware are we working

with? Like jelly chocolate dream

- Or f***ing hammer of thor?

- Adam!

I'm the only one that

thought of it? No way.

- My wife's a lesbo.

- No, she's not a I...

Welcome to the wonderful

world of adultery.

It happens all the time.

- I don't... I don't think it does.

- You know what?

Would you guys stop

trying to cheer me up?

You're all

pretty terrible at it.

- Best-Laid plans, right?

- What?

"Of mice and men. "

"The best laid plans

of mice and men. "

What? What is that?

Like, a beatles song?

"The best laid plans of mice and

men often go awry. " You guys are...

The worst.

I had it all planned out...

Grad school,

Work my way up the company,

Top floor,

corner office.

Then the boss's

f***ing daughter

Throws her tits in my hands

at a christmas party.

She's cool

with the sham marriage.

She's f***ing hot.

You're the boss's son-In-Law.

What... What's the problem? It's

not like you love her or anything.

Yes, i do.

I married her, didn't i?

- Why don't you just get it annulled?

- No, i can't.

I can't get annulled

or divorced or whatever.

I just can't. If vanderplatt

finds out that his little princess

Isn't just completely perfect, he'll

have me fired at the very least.

- I mean, for all i know, that guy'll

have me killed. - You... You blackmail her.

- You tell vanderplatt about the...

Are you kidding?

Did you not just listen

to a single word i just said?

- Yeah, top-Notch commiserating,

adam. - Oh, f*** you, junior.

- Stupid.

- Guys!

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