LOL Page #4

- Everything.

I'd sleep with a different guy

every single night. Just like you do.

Oh, really?

Well, I haven't slept with anybody but you.

I'm not talking about you.

I'm talking about men. Men.

You mean us. You mean us men.

The great confederation of bastards.

Hey, look who's here.

- Mom, Jeremy got a scooter.

- Jeremy got a scooter.

Jeremy got a scooter?

- Yeah. Dad said it was cool.

- Surprise!

- Yeah.

- Yeah, I got the kid a scooter.

Wait, excuse me. We discussed this.

I think I should get one, too.

I could avoid being late for school.

- It's not gonna happen.

- Why?

Because I'm not gonna go

and be peeling you up off of the sidewalk

because you've splattered...

That's dramatic.

It's not dramatic. And it's not happening.

Whatever.

Where are you going?

I've got to show Jeremy

something on the computer.

How can you make that decision without...

- I know. But I've set the table.

- We'll come back.

It's just we're not really interested

in the senior conversations.

Yeah. Thanks, Dad.

- What?

- Senior...

We're not interested

in your teenage conversations.

- Senior conversations?

- Are you serious?

- She's so polite.

- I'm dyeing my beard.

What do you think?

Not bad. Who is it?

It's my friend, Kyle.

Okay, Mr. Kyle.

Shut up.

Does Lola smoke?

Are you crazy?

Do you smoke in front of her?

Never. What about Jeremy?

Don't worry about Jeremy. He hates drugs.

I think I'm going to surfing camp.

What about you?

I don't know, but my dad

is totally doing my mom again.

No sh*t. You cool with that?

No. I'm sick of them lying to me

and I know that it's never going to work.

I know the feeling.

So, I need to ask you a favor.

Okay. What do you need?

I need you to sleep with me.

Now, women dont just screw.

Okay? They need an emotional attachment.

- Do we?

- Though I will say this,

that no matter how liberated

you women think you are,

male sexuality and female sexuality,

very different.

Come on, what's the big deal?

It's not like I asked you for euthanasia.

It's just one little favor.

You've known me forever. Come on.

It's not just a little favor.

Okay. What would you say if I asked you?

Yes.

I say no, okay? I respect you too much.

You guys suck with your stupid respect.

Yeah and when we don't respect you,

we're a**holes, and when we do, we suck.

All right, fine, next subject.

Why don't you do it with Mr. Kyle?

Because he thinks I did it already,

and if I ask him,

then he's going to know that I'm lying.

And so will Chad.

You women really are nuts.

We are not nuts.

Since Lucy has broken up with Rick,

she's going out with a ton of guys.

Everybody knows that Lucy is a slut.

She's having the time of her life.

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