Living Will... Page #5

my friend, two types...

one that's gonna

sacrifice their kneecaps

to save one little piece

of canned good,

but the other...

they're the ones that will

throw those groceries

in the air with gusto

to walk away unscathed.

This one's a thrower.

- Want to get out of here?

- Yeah yeah.

- Let's go.

- Okay.

Come on, Will, you've got this.

Knock it down my urethra.

Right towards my dick.

Oh, eat my puss.

Yo, man, this is bullshit.

You can't make no shot like that.

I know, he's been

making them all night.

Hey, you're making it

so obvious.

These rednecks are

gonna kick our asses.

They're gonna kick

your ass, not mine.

That's great for you.

Oh please. Look at

these f***ing guys.

They're like

rent-a-rednecks.

That guy drives a Saturn and that guy

jerks off to Carrie Underwood.

That's gonna be a real comfort for me

when I'm picking up

what's left of my teeth

off of the floor.

Do you want me to get you a napkin

for your vagina,

- you f***-ass?

- Shut up.

Hey, you see this schizo

talking to himself?

This fruit f***er's been

playing games with us.

What are you doing

over there, fruit f***er?

Fruit f***er?

Are you serious?

- Yeah.

- He just called you fruit f***er.

Hold this.

My God, they're

hysterical.

All right,

you son of a b*tch,

this next shot...

all this money

all this a**hole money

right now,

because you ain't

making sh*t.

You can do this.

All right, eight ball,

corner pocket.

Would this be easier

for you, gaywad?

Mm!

Eat sh*t.

Eat my sh*t.

This a**hole's

doing magic on us.

Yo, man, it's like he's some crazy

Danger Dopperfield.

Well, whatever it is,

you're doing magic on us.

You know what?

I'm gonna f*** this guy up

upside his head.

Great.

Got this.

Yeah!

Yeah!

Not quite sure what just

happened with the thing.

It just kind of... just went

through the doggone air.

I'm just that fast.

I'm Professor Zoom,

motherf***er.

- Ha ha!

- Yeah!

F*** yeah.

Consider that rent,

Mr. Furley.

Take the biggest guy

in the world,

shatter his kneecap

and he'll drop like a stone.

Did you just reference

"Road House"?

- Patrick Swayze at his best.

- Kudos, my friend.

And kudos again,

fruit f***er.

Ooh, that was great.

I think if I wasn't dead,

I would have got my carrot wet.

I think I'm just gonna

hit the hay, so...

man, it's so good to see you.

I had so much fun today.

Thanks, man.

I enjoy being here.

Not you, Matt.

Oh.

My bad.

Yeah.

Hey, Matt, actually

I'm gonna have to ask you to move out

of Belcher's room.

That's cool.

I couldn't afford

rent anyway.

- You weren't gonna pay me?

- No, probably not.

But since we're

on the topic,

could I crash on your

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