Jackass 3D Page #2

you, you took it really good, man.

I am so f***ing hurt!

You were running around

on carbon dioxide.

- Look at your eye.

- God, I gotta get rid of this.

The thing is that Dave

doesn't understand

is that the more you freak out,

the more you get stung.

Idiot!

That felt like somebody was

blowing a fireball in my face.

It looked like you were

just getting the hell beat out of you.

You can't f***ing breathe.

Waiter? Can I get

some cream for my coffee?

That's the story

of Jackass right there.

Just pissing in the wind.

Hey, buddy, would you mind

watching my dog for a second

while I run in there?

Thanks. I'll be right back.

Thank you, buddy.

Thanks, bud.

Thank you very much

for watching my dog.

My name is Johnny Knoxville,

and this is Roller Buffalo.

You're the man!

We're not worthy.

Oh, man. Let me get over here.

- What'd it feel like?

- It felt like Sh*t.

It felt like I got run over

by a buffalo.

It's in my mouth!

Get me out of here! Get me out of here!

Ehren, stay here!

Think we need

to get him out from there?!

Let's get him!

Get it off of him.

- Ehren, stay out!

- All right!

Lance... Hold it together, Lance!

Pull out! OK, pull out! Pull out!

- Did I get the shot?

- You got the shot, dude.

So it went high and everything?

It was like a volcano?

You got a good three feet.

- Three foot?

- Yeah, that one had some power.

- It was like a full-on volcano?

- Absolutely.

Don't say anything.

- What would your flavors be?

- Two Budweisers.

What do I owe you?

Six-fifty, please.

- Keep the change.

- Thank you, dear.

- Cheers. Boop!

- Cheers.

So what's the status?

I don't know. Go down to the beach

or something... hit the water.

You tried it?

Tara! What the f*** are you doing?

What the f***?!

- Who the f*** are you?

- Who are you?

I'm her frickin' boyfriend, a**hole!

That's cool, bud. I'm her man-friend.

Dude, don't push me. Don't push me.

I'm not even touching you.

You know, f*** both of you!

F*** both of you!

Calm down now.

So...

He and I are taking a break and...

Right in here.

Right in here.

F*** you! I told you

to get the f*** away!

- Don't push him, man!

- Stop! Stop! Stop!

Get your ass down!

Keep your punk ass down,

you hunk of sh*t!

Get him, Pop! Get him, Poppy!

Get his ass down!

Get off of him! Stop!

Police! Get on the f***ing ground!

Get on the ground!

Freeze! Everybody up against the wall!

- Up against the wall!

- Get the f*** off me!

What the f*** are you doing?!

Get him up. Get him up!

Freeze, motherf***er!

Get your hands behind your back!

- Let's go, babe!

- F***ing get off me!

Code 54! Paramedic! Paramedic!

Get the f*** off me!

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