How to Steal a Wife Page #3

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So, Mr. PE, did you find that interesting?

Interesting, but I still don't

get where that jar came from.

Well it was a pickle jar.

Now look, storyteller.

I'll give it to you straight.

Valdas Bickus, you are not

going to live here. Got that?

Got it.

Laima?

Laima!

Laima!

What?

That's what.

What happened, Ramutis?

That happened.

- Good morning.

- Hi.

So?

I got up, go to the bathroom, get in

the shower, and I hear someone coming.

Well I thought it was you,

that you got up too...

and I pull open the curtain, look out, and

this guy is peeing and looking me over.

You were looking him over?

I was not looking him over.

I was peeing and he opened the shower

curtain and was looking at me.

OK, the light is on, the water is running, so

now you're going to go in the bathroom, right,

and go pee when you can see

somebody's already there?

- Did you knock?

- No.

Why didn't you knock?

Why didn't he lock the door?

Well, hello, so now I have to start

locking the door in my own home?

So fine, and if you're in the shower,

he's also going to come in to pee?

- OK, fine, and what if I had come in?

- So what? You're my wife.

- Ex.

- Ex!

OK, that's enough.

When you shower, you don't pee,

when you pee-you don't shower.

And we knock.

Have a nice day.

Ramutis, wait.

Come here.

Listen, let me take another look, huh?

Laima!!!

Come on, Mr. PE, I'm kidding.

What are you doing here?

Looking.

For what?

Well, for that... that

thing that disappeared.

I can't find it anywhere.

Have you seen it?

I looked there, I looked there, and now...

It disappeared somewhere.

You understand...

Give me your hand.

Ramutis, what are you looking for?

Well where that...

Ramutis.

I can't figure out where I put it...

I looked in the bedroom and...

Will you talk?

See... it's disappeared,

like into thin air.

Hey, Mr. PE, how much do you make

at that little school of yours?

- I'm the principal.

- OK, principal. How much do you make?

Well, I can't tell you,

it's a state secret.

Two grand?

I can't tell you.

Two and a half? Three?

What, three and a half?

3,600 before tax.

Wow, 3,600 before tax. Listen,

you make 3,600 before tax.

You pay 30% for social security tax, right?

Well yeah, I'm an honest

citizen, I pay taxes.

So listen, honest citizen, you

pay another 20% to the state.

You buy things, food, a refrigerator,

and you pay VAT, right?

Right.

So out of your three and a half, you

give away two thirds in taxes. Right?

So.

So right. And they...

They who?

Well the ones who make

hundreds of millions.

Well they pay two thirds in taxes too.

What, are they special?

Listen, honest citizen.

They pay a little over half a percent.

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