Gilbert Page #4

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- I'm known as a clean comic.

This is different than I

thought it was going to be.

He was much different.

I didn't understand this.

- And now you actually

love doing stand up.

- I do love it.

Don't you feel great after

a set or do you feel,

are you somebody who never

feels good after a set?

- Well my fantasy right before

I'm about to go on stage

is that the manager is

gonna come back stage

and go there was like

a fire or a flood--

- Oh that's interesting.

- Here's your check, go home.

- Yeah, that's, I just

feel as though stand up

can cure me of

life's afflictions.

So if I'm sad it

can change my mood.

If I'm overly confident it

kind of balances me out.

Like I always think it's

strange when people are like

can you believe

Seinfeld's doing stand up?

I'm like he doesn't

have a choice everyone.

- Yeah.

- It's like once

you're a comedian,

you have that heroin

in your system.

It doesn't, here we

are at the Friar's.

There are 90 year old

comedians that go up--

- Oh yeah.

- That can barely move

and when they get on stage

they kind of light up.

- [Frank] Gilbert's one of them.

- Yes.

(laughing)

- I called Dara recently and

I said, "Where's Gilbert?"

And she goes he's on the road.

And I go where is he?

She goes San Antonio.

I said Gilbert Gottfried is

alone in San Antonio right now.

I can't believe that.

I can't believe!

I said who's taking

him to the club,

who's getting him

in the hotel room,

who's opening his bag,

who's telling him where

his toothbrush is?

I lost sleep over it.

(light music)

- Oh.

- He's on the road a lot.

He'll leave on a

Wednesday or a Thursday,

maybe a gig that night,

an early and a late show

on a Friday, an early and

a late show on a Saturday,

fly back on Sunday or Monday.

You know it's a

grind, it's tiring.

- Now I pack very neatly.

These are shorts, t-shirts,

some script for something.

This is usually my flying shirt.

This piece of paper, probably

something I don't need.

See this is why I should

clean out this thing.

These are worn out socks I have

that I'll be wearing today.

Dara's idea was to at least

put some of the stuff in bags.

This actually was a good idea.

- Is anybody talking about

how notoriously cheap he is?

- [Neil] Little bit.

- Yeah, I've only

heard the stories.

When he goes in for

voiceovers and he like

empties all the mints

into his f***in' pockets.

- [Gilbert] Here's some

peanut butter cookies

that I obviously got

for free somewhere.

- I think he's the only guest

that takes all the sodas

from the dressing

room at the show.

I gotta take these with me.

- I imagine he wears

cargo pants a lot.

(laughing)

- Oh the box, the two boxes.

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