Funny About Love Page #3
- PG-13
- Year:
- 1990
- 101 min
- 192 Views
Oh, Duffy.
Oh, honey.
I've got so many kisses
and so many hugs.
I've got, like, a trillion of them.
There's plenty to go around.
Now we'll start on some tests.
Some tests? What kind of tests?
Multiple choice? Essays?
Do I need a number-two pencil?
Maybe I have a number-two pencil.
You have a wonderful,
giant redwood tree of a pencil.
- She said it.
- Let him do this.
The woman knows. What's happening?
It's an auditory monitor
of your scrotal activity.
Oh, I thought maybe you were lonely.
Would you like to listen to your testicles?
- Who wouldn't?
- I would.
I just plug the stethoscope
into these speakers.
I flick this switch...
Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!
I laughed at love
'cause I thought it was funny
- Just a joke, Mr Bergman.
- Is that what it was?
- How amusing!
- I'm trying to get you to relax.
Yes, I feel much better now.
Thank you, Doctor.
- You want my sperm in this cup?
- That's right, Mr Bergman.
- Good luck.
- We'll wait outside.
Wait a minute!
You make this sound easy.
I've never done this before.
- Come, come, Mr Bergman.
- You want me to do it twice?
We'll be here all day.
I deal in quality, not quantity.
- What do you want, a quart?
- Excuse us.
- Duff...
- It's not so easy.
Come here, come here.
I think maybe we should try to work
on this together. What do you say?
Is this business or pleasure?
Intense heat can kill
the reproductive quality in sperm.
- Have you been in a hot tub?
- At my health club. How do you know?
All your sperm
are wearing terry-cloth robes.
- There he goes again.
- Very funny.
All we need to do is lower
the temperature of your sperm.
- This should do the trick.
- What the heck...?
- What's this little pocket for?
- Ice.
- You're doing fine.
- I look silly.
- Here, climb on.
- No, go away!
Come here, come here. Here.
I really think this is the one,
the love of my life.
I'm so delighted, Hugo.
You don't know her last name?
She is vague about personal details,
but I think this is normal
in the Witness Protection Program.
Sorry I'm so late. I had to wait
for the boss to approve my apple crisp.
- How did you do?
- I got a gold star.
Why did I ask?
It's excellent!
You are so good in the kitchen.
- Thanks.
- The bedroom, I don't know.
- Ma!
- Adele!
Did I offend
Hold your tongue once in a while.
It's only in your cartoons that people
may speak without being censored.
No one's censoring you.
"Hold your tongue!" Did anyone hear
that? How about Mr Lonely Hearts?
- I was chewing.
- We're trying, OK?
- Try a little harder.
- Is it a question of velocity?
- Shut up about babies!
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"Funny About Love" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 3 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/funny_about_love_8694>.
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