For the Boys Page #4

What did you do?

Do?

Yeah, do.

To keep up morale and all that.

Well, my copilot, lovely young boy

but terrified half out of his wits,

you know, nervous, terrified.

I said to him

"This one's going to take

a long, hard, pull."

So I did!

For two hours.

Two hours alone with you...

that boy deserves a Purple Heart.

It was purple all right,

but I don't think it was his heart.

I think I've gotta take a cold shower now.

How about a song before we all get arrested?

I'd love to.

Here she is, direct from the convent,

the wonderful Miss Dixie Leonard.

I want her and her mouth

on the next plane outta here.

All right, OK, all right, all right.

So are we being attacked?

I always like to know these things.

- We lost power. Give us a minute or two.

- Why you gotta yell?

Well, alone in the dark

with thousands of men.

There is a god after all.

- Come on, sweetheart. Sing!

- Yeah!

There's only one thing I like to do

in the dark, honey, and it ain't sing.

Oh, my.

Well, if you feel that way about it.

"PS I Love You" in A.

- Is that for me or the guy on the generator?

- You!

I love you. I had the best time.

Thank you.

It was... It was...

Mr Sparks.

- Is there something wrong?

- Yeah, honey. You. You're wrong.

You got a toilet for a mouth.

I don't appreciate it.

A lot of these boys are gonna die

and you wanna send them off

with a bunch of cheap-ass

dick jokes, is that it?

- No, sir. I just thought...

- You thought?

If you haven't got the class,

you oughta have the brains.

- OK, Eddie, enough.

- What?

- You made your point.

- There are a lot of writers without nieces.

Eddie.

How about that?

The fabulous Dixie Leonard.

Really nice work, Dixie.

How about a hand

for the very lovely Vicki Lee?

Not to mention my number one man,

Wally Fields and the boys.

Well, that's our show.

I hope you liked it.

You.

- No autographs, fellas.

- Sam, it's all right.

Just a few.

Eddie, that new stuff I put in tonight,

did you like it?

Not now, honey. That's it.

I don't need this.

I've been working in clubs since I'm 16.

Dixie, when I first started with Eddie,

he fired me every day for a week.

- It's a squall. It passes over.

- He's a racehorse. It's a different set of rules.

He knows what happened out there.

He's no fool.

- He's an evil, sadistic son of a b*tch.

- He happens to be right about the dick jokes.

He kept setting me up.

What did he expect?

Come on, Dixie.

You panicked and went for the crotch.

We get to the hotel and you apologise.

What did I do? I got a few laughs,

I brought down the house, I topped him.

- You're supposed to.

- We're gonna build the act around that.

- What are you talking about? There's no act.

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