Footrot Flats The Dogs Tale Page #3

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Makes you wanna go and shoot a bloody referee, doesn't it.

But wait on!

It's Wallace Footrot!

He's back!

Brave lad!

That'll show them the sort of stuff we're made off. My word!

But I fear it's too late.

What can even a whizzer do with just time for the kick to be taken.

And in comes the boringly consistent pom kicker to convert the try.

He kicks.

It's straight, of course. The pale little pom poofter.

But, wait.

Unbelievable!

What a save!

Wallace Footrot has swung up on the cross-bar and kicked the ball away!

It's a charge down and we're still the world champions!

And the hero of the day: Whizzer Wal Footrot!

An All Blacks selector...

What do you reckon, Dog?

Should I give it a go?

I'll start training immediately.

Starting tomorrow...

Cripes, be like kinda licking a watermelon into shape.

Man needs a good breakfast to train on.

Hmm.

Into it.

And away we go!

Hells bells.

He's old enough to know that all you go to bed with the night before a game is, is a cup of warm cocoa.

Is this "Whizzer Wal Footrot", the panther of the footy paddock?

All you should be wearing is a dedicated smell, mate!

Ye, gods!

Sex scent?

Ooh, that smarts.

Don't go into town, Wal.

Raupo's Sodom and Gomorrha on Friday nights.

Ah. Tonight's the night, Cheeky.

The fool.

He's gonna see that blonde, tantrous Cheeky Hobson.

What a dork!

How can you do this to me, Wal.

Tonight of all nights.

You get a guy to pick fitness...

And he allows himself to be destroyed by the pleasures of the flesh.

Wallie, don't go!

You coming, Dog?

G'day, Wal.

You ready for the big match, mate?

No worries, mate.

'Evening, ladies.

Ah, g'day, Cheeky.

I, uhm..

Gives us five minutes, Wallie.

OK, Cheeky.

I've got just the place lined up for tonight.

I'll book us a table and then after that the night is young.

How about the pictures?

Oh, Wallace.

You mad, rash boy.

Here's looking at you, kid.

Takes us back to the dear old kitchen, Wal.

A nice cuppa tea and a gingernut to dunk.

Shouldn't you oughta be in bed?

Wallie, come home!

Dim lights. The best feed in town.

Oh, Wal. You devil.

Come home, or I'll break your leg!

Get out of it, Dog. Get out of it.

Leave a man alone.

Sorry about that, Cheeky.

Alas, poor Wallace.

I knew him well.

Oh, Wal, you shouldn't have.

I haven't.

Best kai on the coast.

Forget the expense, Cheeky, you can have chips with everything tonight.

Ah, gaston!

The young lady and meself wish to partake of a decent feed before going to the flicks.

What does the chef recommend, ce soir?

"Mr Pawai" to you Footrot and none of your cheek, mate.

Now, oysters and steak and sausages are off.

Baked beans, eggs, chips and savs.

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