Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star Page #4

So, my good buddy...

maybe you've heard of him-

Jorge of the Jungle...

Brendan Frazier.

Oh, you heard me.

I didn't stutter.

Brendan Frazier is

going to make a call...

hook me up with Rob Reiner.

Did Mr. Frazier call you?

I'll believe it when I see it.

Okay, I raise ten bucks.

Actually, one buck

and the original

braces that Marcia wore

in the "Brace Yourself"

episode...

easily worth

nine bucks on eBay.

Gross. I'm in.

All right, I'm in.

All right,

speaking of big stars,

anybody see who People Magazine

gave "Sexiest Man Alive" to?

George Clooney.

Don't get it.

George Clooney?

That doesn't make sense.

Who is voting on that stuff?

You know what, though?

George Clooney is a great star.

He's huge, and deservedly so.

I loved that boat movie.

You know who I don't

get is Brad Pitt.

Yeah, what's up with Brad Pitt?

Brad Pitt changes

his hair every day.

Are girls really into guys

with great hair,

pretty faces

and built like a truck?

- Yeah.

- Actually, yeah.

You know, one time,

someone thought I was

Brad Pitt from the side.

Yeah, I know, like, 20 people

who thought you were a girl

and not from the side.

Watch it.

I raise two bucks

with this authentic replica

of the jinxed

Tiki idol

from the Brady episode

"Hawaii Bound."

Easily worth two bucks on eBay.

I am out.

Yeah, I'm out.

I'm out.

There's your two.

And you know who I don't get?

Vin Diesel.

Oh, yes!

Who's Vin Diesel?

Is he good-Iooking?

I mean, I don't know

what's going on with him.

Is he Chinese?

I don't know.

That's so horrible, man.

You're such a dick.

Besides, he'd kick your ass.

Come on, Dickie.

How jealous can you get, really?

It's getting bad.

Vin Diesel's actually

a cool guy.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

He actually lent me money once.

I just want to be a star again

so goddamn bad.

What's the thing

you miss the most, Dickie?

You know what?

It's not the limos.

Oh, I miss the limos.

It's not the girls,

the money, the parties...

The girls, the money,

the parties...

No, wait.

Seriously, you guys had limos?

You know what?

It's not that stuff I miss.

It's something else.

It's... it's something

I miss so bad it hurts.

I just miss the love, you know?

I miss...

My mom loved me

when I was a star,

and people loved me

when I was a star.

And when somebody loves you,

it gives you a center.

It makes you feel good inside.

That's what being a star

did for me.

But you know what?

It's all going to happen.

I got my fingers crossed.

I got my hopes up

for this Rob Reiner thing.

Anyway... back to work.

Two pair, Williams.

Read it and weep.

Uh-uh-uh!

What are you, nucking futs?

Four of a kind.

You lose.

Oh, man.

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