David Brent: Life on the Road Page #4

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Really?

I never dreamt he'd be on that much.

It's a bit annoying.

It eats up the budget.

But you pay people well, they wanna do

a good job and they wanna keep their job.

So... I'll just cash in another pension.

That's what I've been doing

to finance all this.

I took out a lot of private pensions

in the '90s, you know.

And some of them are worth

as much as I've put in now, so...

And I would have spent that money by now.

And now I am gonna spend it

on rock 'n' roll.

But keep the drums sounding big though.

David is... He's on-site.

Deep down he's supporting me,

and I'm sure he'd love to see me do well.

It's not a lot right now, but, you know,

see how this tour goes. Never know.

There's a similarity there, you know.

I mean, in some ways we're very alike.

Except, you know, he's white and old

and his music is terrible.

But, I mean, we're both just trying

to make it, you know,

I'm just not...

not 100% sure what his "it" is.

Bit of a cock-up.

I've only got four days

actual holiday leave left.

So I've gotta take 11 days unpaid.

- Yeah.

- So...

That's all right, you know, sort of.

This is a holiday, isn't it?

It's what I love doing, so...

And if I get signed,

it's all been worth it.

Er, so my last day is next Friday.

Yeah. Make sure your clients

are covered for the month

and you're away.

Yeah, I am indeed.

- Back on the phones then.

- Yeah.

Yeah. Back on the phone.

It's daft.

I mean, wasting his holiday

in trying to be a pop star.

He'd be far better off, you know,

having a couple of weeks in Marbella.

Relax, nice tan...

Still, his money, his life, innit?

- It's on. Yeah.

- Ooh.

Uh...

My last week, next week. Then I'm off.

Got a few more... gigs to book in.

Get the record companies down, get signed.

Bye-bye nine to five.

Sorry.

No. So, rehearsal tomorrow.

Wait till you see the band.

Great bunch of kids.

Foregone Conclusion, Mark ll.

Do you know what I'm saying?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I did try and get

the old crew back together,

but, um, they hadn't really weathered

as well as me.

Reggie Mental.

He can't drum any more. His back's gone.

He's on painkillers

and physio, permanently, you know.

He's basically an invalid now.

From that.

Jack.

He's married now with four kids.

Look at him there.

Under the thumb.

I bumped into him in Reading,

down the Oracle.

And he was shopping with his wife,

holding hands with kids,

carrying shopping,

papoose with a new baby in it.

And he looked at me,

and he didn't literally say it out loud,

because his wife was there,

but I could see in his eyes,

he was saying, "Kill me."

From that.

And the saddest of all... Mammogram.

Real name, Craig Monkford.

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