
David Brent: Life on the Road
- Year:
- 2016
- 96 min
- $2,348,170
- 923 Views
(3.00 / 1 vote)1
Hello, I'm David Brent.
You probably know me as the star
of the BBC Two documentary The Office,
back in 2000 and...
No, that was then, this is now.
I'm currently a singer-song writer, so...
And a rep.
I work for Lavichem.
What do you mean who does my tampons?
We sell cleaning products.
All toiletry needs, really.
One size fits all.
No, it doesn't, actually.
I am following my dream as the lead singer
in the band Foregone Conclusion.
This is our story.
that dream if I'm being honest.
So when the documentary team
approached me and said they wanted
I said, "Sure, but let's do it big."
That's as stiff as you like
and it won't damage your rug.
Well, that's what I told her.
One last push to see if I can make it
in the music business.
Watch this space.
Let's rock.
# Half a tank should get me to Millbank
# I fill her up and head down to Sidcup
# It's just a meeting
It's only fleeting
# It's just a pitch
And then I'm up to Ipswich
# Life on the road
# Don't need a heavy load
# Foot down to the floor
But no more
# Strictly business
I'm killin' it in Widnes
# Then to Gloucester
I get a Costa
# Hard shoulder
Coffee holder
# Life on the road
# Don't need a heavy load
# Foot down to the floor
But no more #
Personal parking space. Typical.
Oh, here they are.
- Ooh, lovely Serena.
- What?
No, I was just saying.
- When you buying me dinner?
- Never.
No, I'll buy.
Morning. Made you a coffee.
We play these games.
Um, they know I'm available.
It's not like they're
coming on to a married man.
So, all good fun.
I'm in the marketplace, so to speak.
You know, young, free and single.
Not gonna settle down just yet.
I've been out with all sorts of girls.
Rich girls, poor girls, white girls.
You know.
Thin girls, fat girls.
I went out with a very big lady.
Mmm, lovely. Bubbly.
Mmm, beautiful eyes.
All my mates were like, "Oh, Brent, if she
lost weight she'd be an absolute stunner."
And she did lose weight.
And, um... and she wasn't a stunner,
which was very disappointing.
Um, a surprise to everyone.
I think she'd left it a bit late in life
and lost it way too quickly.
So she was left
with that sort of wattle thing.
You know...
And she wasn't bubbly any more.
Bit grumpy.
Always hungry.
So lesson learned. Be what you are.
So, yeah, that's the plan.
Tour, record deal, stick an album out,
make some big bucks, get a fancy crib,
then snare a lucky lady. Yeah.
But at first, life on the open road.
It's in my blood, uh...
- Do you drive?
- You know I do.
I've given you a lift home several times.
- What car you got?
- Red Honda.
Lady across the road from me
has got a red Honda.
That's me.
I live across the road from you.
Oh. Wondered why she was always waving.
Thought she was mental. That explains it.
- I'd like to see you live.
- Ooh, don't know.
The lyrics are a bit hot for you. X-rated.
We got one song, it's about rock 'n' roll,
but it's a metaphor for sex.
It goes... # I'm gonna roll you over
And rock you stupid
# And leave you there just hummin'
# There's a party in my trousers, baby
And everybody's comin' #
You get it?
Ask me how I'm spelling "comin" '?
- How are you spelling "comin" '?
- C-U-M-I-N.
That's cumin.
Double M. Think.
It's... So, yeah.
That sort of coming.
Well, not with... But with... You know.
Although some women do...
squirt.
Don't know what.
Juice.
No one knows.
Right, see you later.
You know, we're top salesmen here.
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"David Brent: Life on the Road" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Web. 8 Feb. 2023. <https://www.scripts.com/script/david_brent:_life_on_the_road_6413>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In