Cougar Club Page #4

Synopsis: When Spence and Hogan graduate from college, life is bleak. They have to work for heinous divorce lawyers that torture them. Spence has a girlfriend from hell and Hogan just wants to start his life already. As luck would have it, our two young men are presented with an opportunity, they develop a club of young men devoted to the older woman, the "Cougar" if you will. It is this club that ultimately guides our two heroes into young adulthood.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Christopher Duddy
Production: AMG Entertainment
  1 win.
 
IMDB:
4.2
R
Year:
2007
93 min
112 Views


while you're down there.

( phone beeps )

Stack:

What's going on with Doreen Wyes?

- I gave you that lead a week ago.

- I'm on it, I'm sending an employee

over to Formosa

Wednesday at 6:
00,

'cause that's where her husband

meets his girlfriend.

Stack:
Took you a f***ing week

to figure that out?!

There was some confusion

about which restaurant.

Whatever.

Send someone f***ing good this time.

( phone beeps )

- Ouch!

- Sorry. Sorry.

I-- I didn't know this was

part of your body.

( retches )

Oh, that's good, that's good.

That's good, that's good.

Oh...

( chuckles )

Uh, anything else, sir?

Yeah yeah, there is.

I got to this little piece

of dried-up sh*t turd

that needs to be pulled

out of my ass.

Come on.

( laughing )

I'm kidding you!

- Get out.

- ( retches )

Dude, these lawyers...

( chuckles )

are a bunch of sweaty jackals,

feeding off

of the weak and sick

and injured little gazelles and sh*t.

I mean, do you really want

one of these... scavengers

- referring you to Yale?

- Right now,

it's the best contact I have,

but there's no reason

you should stay here.

Where the hell am I gonna go?

Go wherever you want.

Spence, now you know

I can't stand

anyone that isn't

a hot older woman or you.

- ( chuckles )

- So wherever you go, I follow.

This may sound

a little weak, lame,

- even a little gay to some people...

- Yeah.

...but f*** it.

I know what I like.

- Hogan.

- All right.

Let's get you in Yale.

Archibald:
Karl!

Out of my office, butt-licker!

Hey, sh*t turd!

Grab your sh*t-turd friend

and get in here.

( laughing )

Hogan!

Hey!

Silver BMW 535--

it's in the parking lot

in the golf club in Bel Air.

Here's the license plate.

Find it and slash the tires.

Go. Now.

Isn't that illegal?

( laughs )

Okay. No, I know

that it's illegal,

but why would you want us

to do something illegal?

Hogan:

My guess would be

that the driver has

an afternoon court appearance

that if he were to miss

would cause him to severely fall

out of favor with the judge,

considering that

it's probably over custody

or some sticky issue like that.

The judge will look more favorably

on the party that is actually in

the courtroom standing in front of him.

Very good, sh*t-turd's friend.

Now, when you're done with that,

you deliver these papers to my wife.

She's at some bake sale

with her girlfriends.

The address is on the envelope.

Tell her she can have her divorce

as long as she understands

that she's now...

totally f***ed.

Tell her that--

- verbatim.

- Yes, sir.

You're still here. Why?

Dude, these guys make

so much f***ing bank here.

- Wow.

- I'm quitting my job.

Man:

Hey, a**holes.

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Christopher Duddy

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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