Cats Kill Page #4

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- Since when are you

so worldly, Ron Joe?

Ron lives in a trailer.

- Like on wheels?

- [Ron] I heard that.

- Ron Joe?

- Hey, stop fighting.

- Yeah, they obviously

don't care where you live.

Tonight, at least.

- Exactly.

Why fight when we can--

- Oh baby, I'm a

lover, not a fighter.

- We both live in

trailers, by the way.

You need any help with that?

- Not this time.

- You know, I used

to be a boy scout.

- You too?

I'm good, really.

We're just running low on wood.

Not sure how long

it's gonna last.

- Looks like we're gonna

have to find another way

to stay warm, right Alana?

- Let's hope

there's enough wood.

- I see how it is.

- Go join your friend,

I'll be right over.

(electronic dance music)

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, hold on, hold on!

So--

- Just tell it.

- So okay.

So, well, you know.

- What do I know?

- The whole town was there.

- Sh*t, like 50 people.

- No, I'm going up

to get my diploma,

and I get to the stage

and I look out and see my mom

and all my family and sh*t.

And it comes to my turn, right?

And I'm up there

with the principal,

shaking his hand and sh*t.

And now Ron, who dropped out

in the 10th grade by the way--

- What?

- Ron, yeah.

Ron stands up on a chair

in the back and yells

"He f***ed your daughter!"

And at this point,

I'm still holding on to

Principal Williams' hand.

And his face, dude, his face.

It was looking grim.

But he knows his daughter's

not the best Christian.

- Oh, sh*t.

- Yeah, I did take

her to prom, so--

- [Ron] Truce, truce.

- What?

- So he looked just about

ready to shake it off

and give the next kid

their diploma when Ron

gets up again and screams:

- [Ron And Steve] "In the ass!"

- Proudest day of my life, dude.

Proudest day of my life.

- Ew, no.

- Nice story, Stephen.

- I liked it.

- [Liz] I'm sure you did, Rikki.

- You let go as soon as

he sounded really corny.

- [Steve] Excuse me.

(sniffs heavily)

- Woo!

- Save some for moi.

It's gonna be a long weekend.

Slow down there, cowboy.

- Fire's almost out.

Oh, must be time for bed.

- [Steve] Your chariot awaits.

- [Rikki] Your

chariot awaits you.

- Your chariot awaits,

Miss Ostravsky.

- Now that is a high

school graduate.

- I resent that.

- Don't worry, I

think it's kinda cute.

- Them?

Cute is not the word.

- No, that Ron's a dropout.

- Don't say that, and

I'm not proud of it.

- Come on, you're

like a bad boy.

What do you think, Alana?

You've always like bad boys.

- I think I have a boyfriend.

- [Ron] I'll be right back.

- Sorry, Alana, I

didn't mean to--

(door closes)

- It's all right,

I already told him.

- No way, I thought you

were totally into him.

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