Bogus Page #5

[TIRES SCREECH]

Harriet:
EXCUSE ME.

EXCUSE ME.

THE FLIGHT FROM:

LAS VEGAS--IS IT IN?

LANDED 20 MINUTES AGO.

I'M LOOKING

FOR A LITTLE BOY.

WAIT, WAIT. ARE YOU

MISS HARRIET FRANKLIN?

YES.

THE BOY'S WAITING

DOWN AT TRAVELER'S AID,

DOWN LEVEL ONE.

TAKE THE ESCALATOR,

TURN RIGHT.

OK. ESCALATOR,

TURN RIGHT.

Woman:
YOU WOULDN'T BE

MISS FRANKLIN?

ACTUALLY,

I WOULD BE.

Woman:
OH.

I'M SORRY I'M LATE.

THE JACKSON STREE BRIDGE WAS OUT,

AND I COULDN' GET ACROSS.

YES, I'M SURE

THAT'S TRUE.

WELL, WE HAVE TO GIVE

OURSELVES A LITTLE

MORE TIME THESE DAYS,

ESPECIALLY WHEN PICKING UP

SUCH PRECIOUS CARGO.

I'LL NEED TO SEE SOME

IDENTIFICATION, PLEASE.

I'M SORRY.

PASSPORT, DRIVER'S LIC--

THANK YOU.

BOY, DO YOU LOOK

LIKE YOUR MOTHER.

Woman:
I.D. IS FINE.

YOU HAVE TO SIGN

RIGHT THERE.

GREAT.

ARE YOU:

A CARD PLAYER?

OH, NO.

HE'S A MAGICIAN.

HE CAN MAKE:

THE ACE OF SPADES

TURN INTO:

THE QUEEN OF HEARTS.

LOOKS LIKE:

HE'S ON SALE.

CAN I TAKE:

THE TAG OFF?

USUALLY THE TAG'S

TAKEN OFF AT THE GATE

WHEN THEY'RE PICKED UP.

I SAID I WAS SORRY.

MM-HMM.

OK. LET ME GE YOUR TAG OFF HERE.

SORRY.

THERE YOU GO.

Woman:

THANK YOU.

SO GET YOUR BACKPACK

AND...

WE'LL GO.

WHAT'S

IN THE PARCEL?

MY PILLOW.

OH.

OK. LET'S GO.

Woman:

GOOD LUCK,

ALBERT.

THAT'S IT. NO MORE

SHORTCUTS FOR ME.

I KNOW BETTER.

YOU KNOW, THERE'S NO

SHORTCUTS IN LIFE.

I'M SURE

YOU KNOW THAT.

I KNOW THAT.

IT'S THE KIND OF THING

WHERE YOU JUST HAVE TO

CONCENTRATE.

BECAUSE I DON' KNOW HOW I GOT HERE.

I'M NOT SURE

I AM HERE.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I DON'T THINK

I'M HERE.

AS A MATTER OF FACT,

I THINK I'M NO REALLY HERE.

AS A MATTER OF FACT,

I AM AN ALIEN:

SPACE MONSTER,

AND I'M GOING TO

EAT YOU UP!

[MONSTER-LIKE ROAR]

AAH!

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

MY COLORING BOOK.

WHAT ABOUT IT?

I LEFT IT ON THE AIRPLANE.

WE'LL GET YOU

ANOTHER ONE.

I NEED THAT ONE!

HEY, I'M GOING TO

GET TOWED AWAY!

Loudspeaker:

FLIGHT 106 FROM ST. LOUIS

NOW ARRIVING AT GATE 61.

[PIGLIKE SQUEAL]

NEVER MIND.

IT'S OK.

WE CAN GO NOW.

OH, WELL,

I'M RELIEVED,

BECAUSE WE WEREN' GOING BACK TO GE A COLORING BOOK.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

SHE'S NERVOUS.

SHE'S A SPACE MONSTER.

SHE HAS:

FUNNY HAIR, HUH?

I KNOW.

YOU KNOW:

WHAT?

I DON'T KNOW.

OH.

HEY! WHAT ARE

YOU DOING?

DON'T WRITE

THAT TICKET, MAN.

I HAD TO PICK UP

THE LITTLE BOY.

HE WAS TRAVELING

BY HIMSELF:

IN TRAVELER'S AID.

DON'T YOU HAVE KIDS?

NO.

WELL, LISTEN.

IT WASN'T THAT LONG.

I WASN'T HERE

BUT 3 MINUTES.

I WAS NOT HERE:

15 MINUTES.

I WOULD KNOW IF:

I WAS HERE 15 MINUTES.

GET IN THE CAR.

IF I WAS HERE:

15 MINUTES,

I WOULD NOT BE:

FOOLING AROUND WITH YOU.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

GET IN!

I WASN'T HERE 15 MINUTES.

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