Batman Ninja

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1

(BATS SCREECHING)

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(THUNDERCLAP)

CATWOMAN:
You think you've

heard every Batman story.

I promise, you haven't.

I wouldn't have

believed it myself

if I hadn't seen it

with my own eyes.

And this time, curiosity

almost killed this cat.

BATMAN:
Shut it down, Grodd.

It's over. You're finished!

GORILLA GRODD:

No, I'm too close.

You will not interfere with my

experiment this time, Batman.

(GROWLS)

Catwoman, don't!

(PANTING)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

BATMAN:
What?

Where am I?

What happened?

(EXCLAIMS)

Hmm?

It's Japanese.

And that's me.

(APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS)

SAMURAI:
There he is,

get him!

Samurai?

Stop! Listen to me, I don't

want to hurt any of you.

Fine, have it

your way.

Explain yourself.

We were sent to find the man

dressed as a bat.

Our master has ordered us

to kill him on sight.

He cannot be allowed to live.

Who's your master?

(HORSES NEIGHING)

(OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

None of this makes any sense.

Everything's offline.

But from the look of it,

this is ancient Japan.

Which doesn't explain

what's going on up there.

BATMAN:
What?

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

- The Joker?

- So soon?

That's right, Bats.

(WHISPERS) It is I.

Damn you!

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Hi.

And Harley Quinn.

Oh, but you

have to admit,

we really had you

going there, didn't we?

That's enough. What are you

playing at this time, Joker?

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Haven't you heard?

Everyone's been calling me

Diruku Tin Mao,

The Demon King.

The most powerful

man in Japan.

But you can call me...

Lord Joker.

Oh, I never really

wanted to be a Lord.

It wasn't what you would

call an aspiration.

But when life throws

you time travels,

sometimes you gotta make travelade.

(LAUGHS)

Guess I have that monkey

to thank for this.

If it wasn't for

his stupid machine

- this tiny island would have never been on my itinerary.

- (GRUMBLES)

I have to say I've really

enjoyed the sushi here.

Mwah. It's even better

with some sauce.

(JOKER LAUGHS EXULTANTLY)

(JOKER GROANS)

(GROANS)

Is it me, or is it

getting hot in here?

Oh, don't run away.

I'm your biggest fan.

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Oh, now, now, Batman, don't

you want to play anymore?

Oh, now look what you've done.

Poison Ivy would be

very disappointed.

Mmm.

Don't you know how bad razor-edged

fighting fans are for the environment?

You're the one who

keeps throwing them.

Because you won't

let them hit you.

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Looks like you're

fresh out of those fans.

So what are you

going to do now, Joker?

- Oh, I've got options, Bats.

- (LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

I've still

got Harley,

- and an army of Samurai who have you surrounded.

- (SNAPS FINGER)

BATMAN:
Seven to one,

I'll take those odds.

(MUFFLED CUNNING LAUGHTER)

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

Should we go

after him, Lord J?

I've got people.

Let's just enjoy

the moonlight.

(EXCLAIMS SATISFACTORILY)

We have all the time

in the world.

SHOGUN:
Move, move.

He can't be far.

- (MEOWING)

- Huh?

(MEOWING)

Don't be afraid.

It's just a little catcall.

Catwoman?

CATWOMAN:
When I saw the

Joker's samurai on the move,

I figured

something was up.

I'm glad

it was you.

How did you

get here?

Same as you.

Gorilla Grodd's time machine.

That was

two years ago.

How is that

even possible?

I downloaded these before the time jump.

Maybe they can help.

JOKER:
Say what's

your business, monkey.

PENGUIN:
Why have you

brought us here?

GORILLA GRODD:
Criminals of Gotham

City, I've gathered you here

to unveil

my greatest invention.

NIGHTWING:
Red Hood,

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