Batman and Harley Quinn Page #4

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with this geezer every six hours?

If you've got a better way to

keep him under our control, I'm all ears.

There's always torture.

I don't torture.

The seven billion meat bags

who infest this world

would probably consider

our plans for them torture.

Or at least cruel and inhumane.

Our plans are for the improvement

of every organism on Earth.

The very definition of humane.

"Humane."

What an ironic word coined by a species

completely devoid of compassion

for any other life-forms.

Or each other, for that matter.

They all talk about climate change,

but have they actually changed anything?

Indeed they have.

They've doubled their output

of greenhouse gases,

increased the rate of deforestation,

ravaged the planet.

You said it yourself, Pamela, and I quote,

"Humans simply will not give a crap

unless we force them to."

Well, once our virus is activated,

every single person on this planet

will have a vested interest

-

(TRACKER BEEPING)

(BEEPS RAPIDLY)

(HARLEY LAUGHING)

NIGHTWING:
Oh, God, no! Stop! Stop!

HARLEY". You stop it!

You're gonna make me pee!

(NIGHTWING LAUGHING)

Hey, hey, hey!

Cut it out!

How about there? You ticklish there?

(BOTH LAUGHING)

- (BATMAN CLEARS THROAT)

- (HARLEY GASPS)

Harley Quinn reporting for duty, sir!

I was, uh... Was just about to call you.

Meet you at the car! (HUMMING)

Did you get what you needed?

Well, yeah.

Ivy's whereabouts, of course.

That's what you meant. Uh, no, not yet.

Like you never

made out with a super-villain.

So, here's how

it's gonna work, Dynamic Duo.

Nobody knows Ivy like I know Ivy.

Now, I can help you find her,

but you're gonna let me talk some sense

into her before you come in swingin'.

And then, when this whole thing is over,

you're gonna put in

a good word for me with the parole board,

tell 'em what a fine, upstanding citizen

I am, etcetera, etcetera.

Hmm...

No.

What the what?

But... I mean, aren't you gonna...

- Don't you need...

- I don't make deals with psychopaths.

Sociopath!

So-ci-0-path!

Jeez, why does everybody

always get that wrong?

If you aren't willing to

agree to my terms, why should I help you?

You'll help us or the rest of the world

will cease to exist.

As insane as you are, you enjoy living.

How about just a little something

to sweeten the deal?

Spa day?

Autographed picture for my little cousin?

He's real sick.

Okay, fine, whatever. You're the boss.

Wait, she's coming with us?

Is that really a good idea?

It's not my first choice,

but we can't afford

to let her out of our sight.

She might tip off Ivy that we're onto her.

Yeah, dangerous loony over here,

never know what she's gonna do!

(GRUNTING)

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