Bad Words Page #4

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(SIGHS)

Subjugate.

What's yours?

Can it be "Shut the f*** up"?

(ELEVATOR DINGS)

Well, that's four words.

A sentence, really.

Pretend you're on

a desert island,

and this gorilla

comes out of the jungle

and holds a gun to

your head and says,

"Hoo! Hoo! Tell me what

your favorite word is!"

What would you say?

Sweet f***. You've got

a gorilla with a gun?

Yeah, a gorilla with a gun.

And he's on a desert island?

He's standing right there!

Here's what I'd do. I'd kick

some sand in the monkey's face,

I'd take his gun and hunt you

down, I'd stick it in your mouth,

and I'd tell you to stop trying

to get all up in

my kitchen, kid!

Again, that's a sentence.

We can finish that later'

Bye-bye.

(LIGHT BUZZING LOUDLY)

Come on.

Unfortunately, the hotel

is completely sold out.

I don't have a bathroom.

Yeah.

Where would the hotel like

me to put my piss and sh*t?

(MAN TALKING ON TV)

Bartender?

Yes, ma'am.

Do you know how to make

an Old Fashioned?

Sure.

Actually, make that two.

No mini-bar, huh?

They've got me in

a storage closet.

I think the queen bee

is sending you a message.

Whatever.

God.

Look at all

the parents around here.

(CHUCKLES)

Like bursting at

the seams with parents.

Here you go.

Where are your parents?

Thank you.

Jenny, come on. I just want to

have a drink in peace. Okay?

And can I give you a little

journalistic advice?

Don't try so hard.

Okay, I'm gonna talk.

We're here three days.

It's difficult to talk

when you're being smothered.

You're like an insolent child

hiding secrets from his mommy.

Really? You're not half the

broad my mother was. Or is.

Cheers.

A seat opened up.

I don't want to talk and

I don't want the drink.

I'm dead serious. Either

you leave or I'm going to.

Or you could stay. I could

; you yet another dinner.

No.

We could expand on this three measly

answers you've given me thus far.

You know too much already.

Do I? Let's see here.

Hold on a second.

Okay. Wild Turkey,

olive green and 32-A.

Favorite drink, color and breast

size are first date questions.

But maybe you've never

been on one of those.

Can you leave me alone? I've asked

you four or five times now.

Why don't you tell me why

you're so angry at the world'?

Just... Come on.

Go ahead. Screw. Please?

Screw?

Screw.

Take off. Hit it.

Did you just tire of

the words "f*** off?"

Because I know you're not suggesting

that I let you f*** me again.

(CHUCKLES)

First of all, you're welcome.

Umm. If you'd like

me to consider

another, uh, event with you,

you can ask me nicely.

And secondly, "f***

off works just great",

if that's what you prefer.

Does that sound better to you'?

Or does "screw"

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