
Bad Words
1
GUY:
I'm not that goodat a lot of stuff.
Especially thinking
things through.
And that's why this
plan was so shitty.
But my feelings were hurt, and I'm glad
I at least did something about it.
Making bad decisions
is nothing new to me.
After all, I live alone at 40,
and I make my living
proofreading product warranties.
A few weeks ago,
I took a break from that,
however, so I could
do this whole thing.
And ifs pretty ironic
that what I did
was exactly what
I threw a tantrum
just to get attention.
BILL:
You mustbe really proud.
I know I am.
And excited.
Meet "The Big Man," right?
But proud either way, of course.
Mm swans
Aren't they amazing? Which one's yours?
Mine's...
Buddy, no' thank you.
What's that?
This chat. I'm all set. I'm just trying
to get some food in my face before
I get stuck up on
that stage, okay?
Right. My bad. You must
be our host for today.
No, I'm not.
I'm the winner.
IRENE:
Everyone,it's time for the 15th
Annual Regional
Spelling Bee to begin.
Take your seats, please.
All of our noble contestants.
Please take your seats up on the stage.
Hurry, hurry!
We're on schedule.
I love the way the hush just comes over
the crowd before we start. Here we go.
(IRENE CONTINUES
CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
What are you doing
on the stage, weirdo?
Your chair called me for help.
(WHISPERING) It was saying, "Help me.
It's so heavy."
You didn't hear it?
I heard it.
(CHUCKLES) I'm sorry, sir.
Those seats are for
the competitors only.
Great. I'm in
the right spot.
(LAUGHS)
Mr. Trilby,
I won't allow it.
You're not eligible in any
fashion, way, shape or manner.
Page 39
Spelling Bee rulebook.
This is rule number 24. This is
sub-point B. This is a quote.
"The speller must not have
passed beyond the 8th grade"
"on or before February 1st, 2011"
That is a rule written by
the governing institute.
And if you want, you can
continue to ogle my transcript,
just please don't
wrinkle it any further.
But you can see there,
unfortunately,
I have not passed the 8th grade
Not ever.
That may be, but...
But, sir, I can go on.
I can go on and on and on.
There are 83 paragraphs,
581 lines of rules
in the rulebook,
but lei me assure you, I'm compliant
with every single one of them.
The spelling bee
is meant for kids.
Not adults that couldn't even
graduate the 8th grade.
Oh, boy.
Are we past the rules
and into the insults now?
Is it insult time? I'm
sorry, but you're an adult.
Because your potholder vest
Are you ready for that'?
You know what? Enough. This
is all just a moot point.
Every contestant
must be sponsored
by a nationally-recognized
news service.
The end.
Mmm, I understand.
That doesn't end
the conversation.
Guess what?
JENNY:
Hello.Perfect timing.
What's going on here?
Who is this?
This is my sponsor from a
nationally-recognized news service.
Jenny Widgeon.
The Click and Scroll.
The what?
What's that? Is that
something on the computer?
Yes, we're an online paper.
Said differently, a
nationally-recognized news service.
They don't want to
let me participate.
(SIGHS)
Go ahead. Set it in motion.
I love your vest.
He's an adult.
JENNY:
In abouta half an hour,
you're gonna be receiving
a temporary restraining order
and a preliminary injunction
prohibiting the continuation
of this competition until we clear
Plus, and this is
a selfish note for me,
it's gonna make
one hell of a story.
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
"Bad Words" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 21 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bad_words_3474>.