American Pie 2 Page #5

Ah, yes, you would be

referring to...

the flute-fetish band geek that made me

her b*tch, then ditched me after prom.

Yes, that's great experience.

You just gotta

find the right girl, Jimbo.

- Brings it all together.

- I had the right woman.

She just sells her cottage

and takes off to parts unknown.

My romantic life

has passed its peak.

Take me out to the pasture

and shoot me.

Super start to a super summer, fellas.

Welcome home.

Guys, I got it.

Pack your bags.

For what?

We're moving to the lake.

We're gonna be the sh*t.

Everybody on the beach is gonna know us.

Plenty of opportunities

to practise for Nadia.

Throw a huge party at the end

of the summer to cap it all off.

Dude, that's a great idea. That way

we'll be able to welcome Heather back...

and we'll be able to prepare

for Nadia's big arrival.

This is it.

This is my summer of love.

Just thought I'd say

goodbye to you animals.

Hey, Mr Levenstein.

How are you, sir?

- All packed up, I see.

- We're all set, Dad.

Don't worry, okay?

I'll be fine.

Come on and give

your old man a hug.

Keep it real, homies.

You too, sir.

Have a good summer.

All right, let's go.

I've been running

these numbers here...

and I don't think the four of us

can afford this place.

- Not on summer jobs.

- Well, I kinda thought of that.

So, I invited someone else.

Oh, yeah! The Stifmeister's

coming back to Grand Harbour!

Deck the halls!

Bye-bye, Great Falls!

Wipe my ass and lick my balls!

It's Stifler time, baby!

Stifler, if you're gonna be living

with us, you gotta behave yourself.

All right, you and Finch

just stay out of each other's way.

Kevin, Stifler's stench

is unavoidable.

Finch, fist yourself.

That's right, baby.

We're here.

Yeah, baby, we're here!

- It's a palace.

- It's a temple.

Isn't this great?

Are you kidding me?

This just won't do.

Guys.

Check this out.

This is it.

Will you idiots tell me

what this f***er's doin'?

Don't touch me

while I'm tantric.

''Tantric?''

What the f*** is tantric?

It's a Buddhist discipline.

You learn to channel

your body's energies-- your chakras.

When you can do that, you can have sex

for hours, even days.

And this stuff's for real?

It's been around for centuries.

With tantra you can make

an entire session of sex...

feel like one giant orgasm.

Eventually, you can sustain

that feeling by meditating.

- Maybe you can teach me sometime?

- Very doubtful.

- True.

- Come on, Jim.

- You can't possibly be that bad.

- Oh, no?

No way.

I guess there's only one person

that really knows for sure, huh?

Oh, yeah?

Where is she this summer?

Hey, are you here for

the mid-session performance?

Guests go in the amphitheatre.

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