Airplane II: The Sequel Page #7

He passes a line of peasants held at gunpoint by soldiers.

We HOLD on them. In b.g. are stores like HITLER'S SHOES,

TRIEU GUYS FROM SAIGON LIQUORS, KEY'S KEYS -- GENERAL KEY

stands in doorway.

SOLDIER:

(to first peasant)

Traficante de drugas o communista?

SUPER:
SUBTITLES -- "Drug dealer or communist?"

PEASANT:

(pleading)

Traficante de drugas, traficante de

drugas!

SUPER:
SUBTITLES -- "Drug dealer, drug dealer!"

The soldier lets the peasant go.

SOLDIER:

(to second peasant)

Traficante de drugas o communista?

SUPER:
SUBTITLES -- "Drug dealer or communist?"

The peasant panics and bolts from the line. The soldiers

FIRE.

SOLDIER:

Communista!

He runs up to THE HOTEL MONTENEGRO. A sign reads, "TV,

POOL, WATERBEDS, DONKEY, KLEENEX" -- All but "KLEENEX" are

crossed out. He runs inside.

INT. HOTEL LOBBY

A clean-cut AMERICAN COUPLE argue with Desk Clerk.

YOUNG MAN:

(to Desk Clerk)

We've lost all our travelers' checks!

YOUNG WOMAN:

What are we going to do?!

CLERK:

Calm down. What kind were they?

YOUNG MAN:

American Excess!

The Clerk throws up his hands and strikes the same pose as

the Karl Marden look-alike in the "AMERICAN EXCESS" poster,

b.g.

CLERK:

I'd say you're f***ed.

The boy passes them and bounds up the stairs.

INT. HOTEL ROOM

CLOSEUP of Ted pacing.

TED:

(to self)

Next thing I know, I'm the chief test

pilot for the XR-2300, NASA's first

Mercury shuttle. That is, until I report

she's got more flaws than the Titanic.

LOOSEN slowly to find the Cross empty and the man who was on

it hanging, his feet dangling next to Ted.

TED:

Now I'm testing old F-l8s for some crazy

Generalissimo who thinks there's a commie

behind every tree in the Amazon.

SUDDENLY the boy bursts in.

BOY:

Senor Ted! Look!

Ted spins and the paper stays still. He stops.

TED:

My God! They're launching the ZR-2300.

Do you know what that is, Jose?

BOY:

The muffler bracket for a '78 Pinto.

TED:

No, that's an XR-2200. The XR-2300 is the

Mercury shuttle. They can't do it!

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