Rodney Carrington: Here Comes the Truth

Synopsis: Raunchy country comic and musician Rodney Carrington jokes and sings about life in his 40s, poking fun at sex, relationships and gaining weight.
Production: Netflix
 
IMDB:
4.5
Year:
2017
66 min
374 Views


[laughter]

"Have you been eating pussy?

It's all over your goddamn face."

[he sighs]

I'm not that motivated.

I don't have to worry.

Not a lot of women are going, "I want

to f*ck that fat little son of a bitch."

[laughter]

Except another fat little son of a bitch.

Which, by the way, are fun to f*ck.

Now that old Rod's a fatty, I've had to...

well, you know, I've had a few fatties.

I was with this girl one night.

She was about 180. Real good-looking.

Five-two. One-eighty.

[laughter]

She's sitting on top of me

and she puts her hand on my forehead,

and leans over and presses,

and I'm like, "What the f*ck?"

She goes, "I am going

to f*ck the shit out of you."

I said, "I hope you do."

She goes, "I am going to tear

your little dick off with my vagina."

I said, "I dare you."

[laughter]

And she got to rocking back and forth.

And she had shaved all her shit,

but it was about two weeks earlier.

[laughter]

Yeah.

She had, like, a sailor beard

going on down there.

And it was rubbing against my stomach.

I'm like, "Whoa, slow the f*ck down.

You're going to start a friction fire."

[laughter]

"You're going to burn a hole

in my goddamn stomach.

I need some Neosporin. I can barely keep

a hard-on, it's burning so much.

My leg has been asleep for 15 minutes.

Use the stirrups every now and then."

[laughter]

"I'm going to get some Neosporin,

and when I come back, I'm on top, chubby."

[laughter]

I was down here about two nights ago,

drinking with one of my buddies.

It's one of them bars where you sit

at the bar and see yourself in the mirror.

Get drunker as the night goes on.

And this drunk Christian woman

walked up to me.

Because there's a bunch in this town.

[laughter]

A lot of drunk Christian women.

She walked up to me

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Rodney Carrington: Here Comes the Truth" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 20 Apr. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/rodney_carrington:_here_comes_the_truth_17098>.

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