Party Bus to Hell Page #2

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I gave up a hunting trip

in Africa for this.

Well, there's better music and plenty

of eye candy of the female variety.

It's pretty amazing.

It doesn't matter

if you're rich or poor,

just as long as you bring enough

condoms and toilet paper.

And I did not forget

the Viagra either.

- Ooh, Viagra's a good gift.

- Not a gift. It's for me.

My gift is my dick.

- [brakes hiss]

- Are we there?

[all]

Come on. Aw.

Hey. Everybody out.

We're just making

a quick pit stop.

Gonna check the wheel

tire pressure.

So, sit tight.

We'll be back on the road

before you know it.

No problem, as long as

we get there tonight.

Don't worry, sweetie,

it's going to be the night

of your life.

[chuckling]

Hey, who's up for 100 bottles

of beer on the wall?

- I am.

- Me! I'll have a beer.

Me, too.

Oh, no, the song,

not real beers, you know.

100 bottles of beer

on the wall

100 bottles of beer

[all] Take one down,

pass it around

99 bottles of beer

on the wall

99 bottles of beer

Take one down,

pass it around

99 bottles of beer

on the wall

[all singing]

Hey, Lara, will you...

will you help me in the

bathroom with something?

- With what?

- You'll see.

- [giggles]

- [singing continues]

Great, and I have to pee.

There's a whole desert

out there.

Just think of it

as one giant sandbox.

Thanks, I'll hold it.

- Mmm.

- [Lara] Oh.

Oh, oh.

[giggling]

Oh, my God.

You've got a strong bladder

there, honey.

[man] That's what

I'm talking about.

Young love,

it's a beautiful thing!

[man #2] Yeah.

[man #3] Rock that p*ssy!

Where are you going?

Stretch my legs.

She told us not

to leave the bus.

Drivers do not tell the

paying customer what to do.

Other way around, buddy.

Learn it, live it, love it.

Keep the groove

so we can dance

Keep the groove

so we can dance

Keep the groove

so we can dance

Krystal, if you're giving dance

seminars at Burning Man, sign me up.

- What are you offering?

- Free massages.

And for you as well.

Come on, let's party.

Oh, I love communing

with nature.

[man] Looks like it's

going to be a nice night.

- Once we ever get there.

- Well, you know what they say.

It's not about the destination but

enjoying the journey that matters.

And who are "they," exactly?

Oh, they? They are those who

know and say things of wisdom.

Well, I don't know them,

and I don't know you, either.

Oh, sorry, Stuart Parker, veterinarian.

Pleasure to meet you.

Oh, Alan Armstrong,

rich-as-f*** entrepreneur

and wild game hunter

on the side, but,

I'll happily kill

any type of animal.

I'm not picky.

I see.

- That wasn't very nice.

- I didn't come here to be nice.

I came here to f***, do drugs,

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