Dirty 30 Page #2

with your own practice."

- Cool.

Teenage me's already 0 for 1.

- "There will be a little one

to take care of

or at least a bun in the oven."

- I don't even use my oven.

Literally or metaphorically.

- "You will have the greatest

guy in the world.

"He'll be handsome and sweet

and funny.

"I have no doubt you will have

the most incredible life.

I'll see you then."

- Yeah, that last line

was pretty creepy.

- "Enjoy your

30th b-day blowout bash, Kate.

I'm sure it will be a night

to remember."

See?

Look.

Your 16-year-old self

wanted a party, so please.

- Absolutely not.

In fact, I'm gonna go on record

right now and say that we're not

doing anything for my birthday,

so you guys make other plans.

Oh, there's a p.S.

"P.S. Ashley Driscoll

can eat sh*t."

Classy.

- Oh, Ashley Driscoll.

- You know, on my first day

at Lincoln high,

Ashley Driscoll told me

my bowl cut looked like

a turtle was sitting on my head,

and then she threw lettuce

at me.

- Well, you still have

a bowl cut,

but it's an edgier bowl cut.

- There's a bowl cut

in my heart.

- She called me a theaturd.

- What is that?

- It's a combination

of the word "theater"

and the word "turd."

- Yeah, she was a b*tch,

but she dated Peter Finch.

Peter Finch was so hot.

Wow.

- Oh, that's my ride.

Did you still want us

to drop you off?

- Yeah.

Yeah, I should go.

Todd hates it when I'm late.

- All right.

Well, I'll see you guys later.

- I'll see you this weekend at

the party...

Both:
Party, party, party,

party, party, party.

Yeah, I can't do it.

- That was wet.

- Sorry.

So I can throw you

a party, right?

- Nope.

- Got it.

- Have fun with the dishes.

- Our gift to you.

- Hey, Kate.

Congrats on surviving till 30.

You go, girl.

You will be

a super successful orthodontist

with your own practice.

There will be a little one

to take care of

or at least a bun in the oven.

You'll have the greatest guy

in the world.

He'll be handsome and sweet

and funny.

You will have the most

incredible life.

I'll see you then.

- Excuse me.

- Thank you.

My card wasn't working.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

I can't let you

into the building.

- What?

- I have no proof

that you work here.

- No, I have a card.

- But it doesn't work,

so could be a fake.

I'm sorry.

- Are you Ashley Driscoll?

- Yes.

If you want to schedule

an appointment,

you can call my office.

- No, um, it's Kate fields.

From Lincoln high.

Braceface.

- Braceface!

- Oh, my god!

Look at you.

You look, you know,

so much older.

- Thanks.

I did not know you worked

in the building.

- Yeah.

My real estate business

got too big for my old office,

so now I have

the whole top floor.

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