A Voyage Round My Father Page #2

which goes straight

to the secret heart

of this wretched

little conspiracy.

Where was my client's husband

during these observations?

Captain Waring had accompanied

me as we kept watch.

And did he not storm the house?

Did he not beat upon the door?

Did he not seize his wife's

paramour by the throat

and hurl him into the gutter?

According to my notebook, no.

What does the fellow say?

Not according to his notebook,

dear.

Ah.

Then, according to

your notebook...

was he enjoying himself?

- Really.

- Please, Mr. Bulstrode!

I have sat here for three days

like patience on a monument

while a series of spiteful,

mean, petty,

sickening,

and small-minded charges

are tediously paraded

against the unfortunate woman

I represent.

And now,

when I rise to cross-question,

I will not be interrupted!

Gentlemen.

Gentlemen, please.

[Clears throat]

What was your question?

I have forgotten it.

My learned friend's interruption

has had the effect

he no doubt intended,

and I have forgotten

my question.

But this is intolerable.

Ah!

Now I've remembered it again.

Uh, did he enjoy the night

he spent in the field

from which he was miraculously

able to overlook

his own kitchen?

SON'.

He sent words into the darkness

like soldiers to battle

and was never short

of reinforcements.

In the law courts, he gave

his public performance.

You must understand

that Captain Waring

has already given evidence

to this court.

On the subject

of racing glasses?

No, Mr. Bulstrode.

On the subject of love.

He has told us

that he was deeply and sincerely

in love with his wife.

I don't know anything

about that.

Exactly, Mr. Thong.

You are hardly an expert witness

on the subject of love, are you?

Members of the jury,

love has driven men and women in

times past to curious extremes.

It led Juliet to feign death

and Ophelia to madness.

No doubt it disturbed the

serenity of the Garden of Eden,

and we are told

it started the Trojan War.

But surely there is

no more curious example

of the mysterious effects of

the passion than the spectacle

of Captain Waring

of the Royal Engineers

roosting in a tree,

complacently viewing

the seduction of his beloved

through a pair

of strong racing binoculars.

Is not the whole story,

members of the jury,

an improbable and impertinent

tissue of falsehoods?

Bu! As soon as possible,

he returned to the safety

of the dahlias,

the ritual

of the evening earwig hunt.

Visitors were rare,

and h' spotted,

my father would move further

into the foliage

- until the danger was passed.

- Oh, my God.

Oh, really.

Well, I'm going to ground.

Oh. Oh.

Oh.

- Coast clear?

- I'm sure she saw us.

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