Synopsis: Jonathan Jones, a professor of ancient languages, comes into possession of an ancient coin. He translates its inscription, which gives him three powers: to inflict pain, slow down time or kill. Soon, he's pursued by enemy spies who have learned about the magic coin.
Genre: Comedy, Fantasy
Director(s): William Castle
Production: Columbia Pictures
87 min



What's Zotz?




Uncle Jonathan.


Uncle Jonathan.

Morning, darling.

Poison. Slow death.

Yes, but what

a way to go.

Straight sauerkraut juice!

How do you do it?

Very bracing.

You must try it sometime.

How's the wheat germ?

Sounds good.


Oh, that must be the

mailman. No, I'll get it.

I'm expecting a journal of the

American Etymological Society.

Anything for me?

Just a postcard from your vacationing

parents. Hey, Venice, very pretty.

Nothing from Eddie?

Eddie? Who's Eddie?

You know very well who

Eddie is. Eddie Prentiss.

One of your brightest

pupils last term.

Prentiss. Prentiss.

The boy who won a fellowship and went on

an archaeological expedition to Uk... Uk...

Uh, Ukranistan?

Yes. That is from Eddie.

Only teasing you, darling.

Oh, look, a present.

It's a charm bracelet.

Mmm, it's very pretty. What

does Prentiss have to say?

Just a lot of personal

stuff. You know.

I know.

But he says

he'll be home soon.

They found the ruins

they were looking for.

Mmm. Excellent.

In fact, the charm on the

bracelet is some ancient coin

he found in a temple

they uncovered there.

It was attached to the right hand

of a gigantic stone idol, he says.

It's a relic from some ancient

civilization. Isn't that exciting?


"Shesh, shash. "

Shesh, shash.


Morning, Kellgore.

You almost ran me down.

Oh, I'm very sorry.

But I didn't, did I?

No, but you came

awfully close.

Please accept my apologies,

old man. Shesh, shash.

Uh, what'd you say?

What? Say? Oh, nothing,

Kellgore, nothing.

Well, it sounded like

you said "shesh, shash. "

Oh, yes, I did.

Quite right.

Yes. Shesh, shash.

Morning, Kellgore.

Morning, Jones.

Good morning.

Good morning,


Yesterday, we considered the

transmutation of certain words

from the Assyro Babylonic.

And we noted that the Assyro

Babylonic word for house, bitu,

appears in the

classical Hebrew as...

As what, Mr. Crane?

Uh, bayeth.

Well, almost right, Mr. Crane.

Thank you.

The correct pronunciation

is bayeth.

And who can tell us what form

the word takes in Aramaic?

Yes, Miss Blakiston?


Quite right, Miss Blakiston.

Thank you.

You could build a

tremendous edifice of error

based on the fact that the Hebrew

and Sanskrit words for "six"

are almost identical,

although wholly unrelated.

They are, if I may remind

you, shesh and shash.

Shesh, shash?

Uh, yes, sir. Right in the middle of

the campus, this morning. Shesh, shash.

Professor Kellgore, I don't

think we need worry ourselves.

Professor Jones is a very brilliant man

in the field of ancient Eastern languages,

as you are brilliant in the field

of modern European languages.

I think we can allow him a

few little peculiarities, hmm?

Sir, I'm sure that Professor Jones

is excellent in the classroom.

Well, then?

But his executive ability...

Could Saracen Valley

have a dean of language

who goes around

muttering "shesh, shash"?

Hmm. Well, I haven't

retired yet, Professor,

nor have I named

my successor.

It's still a choice between

you and Professor Jones.

Then you haven't

decided yet?

Not yet.

Then you'll take this "shesh,

shash" matter under consideration?

Oh, I will, I will.

Thank you, Professor.

Good morning.

Good morning, Dean.

Good morning.

Shesh, shash.

Uncle Jonathan?


How was your day?

Oh, fine.

What's for dinner?

Filet of eggplant?

Filet of eggplant.

Medium rare?

Of course.



Oh, pass the

monosodium glutamate, please.

Thank you.

Say, you know, dear, he really

shouldn't have sent this to you.

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Ray Russell

Ray Russell (September 4, 1924 – March 15, 1999) was an American editor and writer of short stories, novels, and screenplays. Russell is best known for his horror fiction, although he also wrote mystery and science fiction stories.His most famous short fiction is "Sardonicus", which appeared in the January 1961 issue of Playboy magazine, and was subsequently adapted by Russell into a screenplay for William Castle's film version, titled Mr. Sardonicus. American writer Stephen King called "Sardonicus" "perhaps the finest example of the modern gothic ever written". "Sardonicus" was part of a trio of stories with "Sanguinarius" and "Sagittarius". more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Zotz!" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2022. Web. 28 Sep. 2022. <https://www.scripts.com/script/zotz!_24056>.

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