Worth Winning

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[Horse Nickers]

Whoa!

Now that's a fine animal.

Oh, yeah.

Great stud, I bet.

Now, the real advantage ofbeing here today

at Atlantic City Racecourse..

to bring you the weather

is that we've got the real thing.

No boards, no mattes,

no pretty computer graphics. Uh-uh.

The real thing.

We got the real sun,

as I predicted.

We've got the real blue skies,

as I predicted.

Heck, we even got real horses,

as I predicted.

- [ All Laughing ]

- And speaking of predictions...

hey, we even got a real winner.

Oh!

This is TaylorWorth,

Channel 5 News, Philadelphia...

- and I'll seeyou at 1 1 :00.

- And we're clear.

[Women Murmuring ]

Ladies' day at the races.

I'm a happy guy.

[Man Singing]

[Continues ]

[Vocalizing]

[Singing Continues ]

That's 1 0, 20, five-fifty.

Number seven,

Movin' Marcel, to show.

- Come on, Ned, at least bet him to win.

- Thankuou.

Hi. Fortu dollars, numberthree...

My Charlie's Angel to win, please.

Thankyou.

- My gambling fund's a little low.

- Gambling fund.

- Gambling fund?. Ned, what happened toyou?.

- Yeah.

What happened to the kid who bet his father's

golf clubs on Cindy Brownell's bra size?.

Hey, rememberwhen I bet my scholarship money

you'd flunk out before midterms?.

Yeah. What happened?.

Daddy, Daddy, Daddy.

I settled down.

Come on, pumpkin.

Ned's actually a terrific guy,

except he's lost his edge.

When we were 1 1, he decided

we should get Mohawks.

- I shaved my head. He laughed for a month.

- You see this 50?.

- Yeah.

- And you see that 50?.

- They're not the same.

- They're not?.

No, this is three days

of nursery school to me.

And what's that?.

Champagne for two?.

- Silk panties for Mona.

- Mona?.

- Do I know Mona?.

- No, I haven't mentioned her.

You're buying silk panties for a girl

you haven't even mentioned to me?.

Ned, it's not important.

Don't worry about it.

There is no Mona.

- Taylor.

- Lizbette.

- Don't sweet talk me.

- How are you?.

How should I be?.

You asked Wendy out, my own roommate.

I know.

You workTuesday nights.

- Don't touch me.

- She said no.

- Of course she did.

- See?. No harm done.

He is my hero.

A hero should

accomplish something.

I mean, what has Taylor accomplished?.

We are happily married men.

- With curfews.

- Yeah, I'd rather be like Taylor.

Well, Taylor doesn't know ityet,

but he'd rather be like us.

Youshouldsee him with mufamilu.

He reallusoaks it up.

No, that's what he reallywants.

He just doesn't know it yet.

Hey, I'm a shrink.

I know these things, right?.

[Ned]

Oh, I'm worriedabout him.

Oh. Did you get a load

ofher legs?.

Yes.

Don't you understand?.

He is dumping her.

Tauloris stuck

in a very destructive pattern.

They hit the two-month mark,

and he is running.

It's classic-- reject them

before they reject you.

[ Guffaws ]

No, no woman is ever gonna reject Taylor.

Oh, and it's too bad,

because that's what he really needs.

Well, that's what every man really needs.

Without suffering, you don't grow.

Yeah, forget it.

It'll never happen.

If only there was something

I could do for him.

If only I could pick

Taylor's next woman.

You know, someone who will dump him first.

Someone who will give him the gift ofheartache.

- Someone with P.M.S.

- No.

Someone who's looking

for more in a man than good looks.

- And a great sense ofhumor.

- And a six-figure income.

- And glamorous job.

- Yeah, but more than that.

Someone who will

torture him a little bit.

- Ned.

- Turn him inside out. Hurt him. Like love.

Forget it.

She's not out there.

- No, I bet I could find her.

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