Worlds Greatest Dad Page #3

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Thank you.

Thank you.

- You're grounded.

- I'll run away.

Oh, and live

with your mother?

And her boy-toy Todd?

That's a great idea.

- I'll take away your computer.

- No, you won't.

Yes, I will.

Jesus christ, Kyle,

what did I do

to deserve this?

I didn't ask to be born.

Neither did I.

Boo hoo.

Woman:

You are so funny!

Wait, read from here.

Starting there.

- What are you reading?

- "We don't experience it

as a restriction!"

- What's that?

- Oh, God, you are so funny.

It's... come here.

Give it to me.

- Oh, this is embarrassing.

- Mike got published

- in "The New Yorker."

- "New Yorker"!

- Hello!

- "The New Yorker"?

Woman:
It's about

the first robot that joins the NBA.

- It's like a parody about racism.

- Miss Reed:
Racism.

- It's hysterical.

- No, it isn't.

No, it is seriously so good.

Called "I, Forward."

Get it?

Yeah, like "I, Robot."

- Right, but "I, Forward."

- Yeah.

It's... it's really hard

getting in "The New Yorker."

- It is?

- Yeah, really.

It's the first thing

I submitted.

Woman:
That's amaz...

I'm amazed.

The first thing? No.

- That's great. Good for you.

- What's that?

Mike got published

in "The New Yorker."

You don't say!

May I see it?

- Sure.

- It's about racism.

Hot dog! Now don't go

getting too famous on us.

- (all laughing)

- What's that?

Mike published an article

in "The New Yorker."

- Take a look at that.

- Ho ho!

Right on.

You dog, you dog!

- Yeah!

- (all cheering)

This should be read

at assembly.

Now that is a great idea.

Mike, would you read it

at the assembly?

If you twist my arm,

all right.

(all cheering)

May I take this

with me?

- Yeah, sure.

- Can I read it after him?

That's awesome.

Congratulations.

Hey, blow my whistle.

Come on..."The New Yorker"!

For "The New Yorker"!

Yeah!

(all cheering)

Wow, I cannot wait

to get my own copy.

"New Yorker."

It's not a national,

- but that's amazing.

- No.

Actually, it is

a national magazine.

- It's national.

- Really?

Whoa, I didn't know that.

Mmm.

How's Kyle?

Great.

Raising a son is so hard.

Don't get me wrong, my Hunter is

the best thing that ever happened to me.

But man, can he be a handful.

- How old is he?

- Two, going on 20.

Oh, God.

The kid's a player.

Well, I wonder where

he gets that from.

- I have no idea.

- (laughs)

How's he dealing

with the separation?

Real well.

I didn't know

you were separated.

Yeah.

It's been tough,

but his mother and I were supposed

to make a baby together.

We just weren't supposed

to live together.

- That's so sad.

- Yeah.

Thanks.

How often do you see him?

Every other weekend.

They're not kidding when

they say that raising a child

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