With Honors Page #13

cardiac arrest.

There's really nothing to do but wait.

I'm sorry.

Harvard! Dinner's served!

Get it down here, boy!

I can't believe it.

What? It's a miracle I can cook. It's easy.

All you gotta do is talk a little Frenchy

while you do it.

I could use a good meal

before I get back to work.

Back to work. It's New Year's Eve.

Who do you think you are, Dick Clark?

Besides, didn't I give you back your thesis?

You should be finished by now.

I'm starting over.

- You tossed it?

- Yeah, I threw it out.

The whole thing?

Yeah, gone.

Boy, oh, boy. Eat up.

- Want to hear what the new one's on.

- Nope.

''Behold I do not give lectures

or a little charity.

''When I give, I give myself.''

This is great!

You must be feeling better.

You went out and shopped.

I didn't go out.

I eat what's handy. It wasn't hard.

Except for the plucking.

Plucking?

Gorky.

Happy New Year, Harvard!

Holy sh*t!

You think so? Looks like the regular

garden variety to me.

Where are you going? Shut the door!

Big baby? Now he'll probably

tell everybody.

- He's in the bathroom.

- Hi! When did you get back?

- What the hell is he doing in there?

- Taking a dump.

Bingo. That boy didn't go

to Harvard for nothing.

Honey, I'm home!

He goes right now!

Peace, children.

Mr. Wilder, how nice to see you.

I'm sorry, Jeff, but...

...he's our new Boz.

That's me, Boz.

I just flew in from Bali.

Boz, my long-lost brother!

Where's your tan, man?

We've been through this.

He gets money from Social Security.

He can pay for rent and food.

That's right.

I have the full backing and faith

of the United States government.

''God loves Americans''

You're telling me you want to live

with this guy? This guy's a psychotic.

Will you stop singing?

Sing a song every day,

keep your voices high and gay.

If everybody sings a song,

never will the world go wrong.

All right, so you can't carry a tune,

but can you cook?

Can I cook?

Does Madonna take her clothes off?

Do Hussein and Ghadaffi pull

each other's taffy?

Yes! But I don't do windows.

- You got Fridays.

- I'm in.

- I will not put up with this!

- Then don't.

Mr. Wilder will cover your rent.

Get out of my way, Jeff.

She's right, you big baby.

I have a complaint.

Boy, oh, boy. Let me help you with this.

My van still isn't fixed!

That's because I ran out of wine.

Oh, my God, he didn't even flush!

It's the Ides of March.

And to celebrate, we have a guest.

Is it Whitman's ghost.

Is it the slayer of Dragon Pitkannan?

No, it's...

The bum of the month!

You're a widely traveled man, an expert on

how to live comfortably away from home.

Would you say Harvard is

your favorite spot?

No way Jos!

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