
Wind Chill
Oh. Jerk.
Hey.
Do you think you could have parked
any further from the entrance?
Yeah, well, there were still some cars
when I got here. So...
Right.
I thought we were going to get an early start
and stay out of the snow.
What time is it?
I'm sorry,
you should have just left without me.
That's what I would have done.
I'm kind of getting kicked
out of my apartment, so...
- Okay, well, there's no room.
- Oh, no, no, no.
Why don't you just get the engine started
and put the heat on, okay?
And I can handle this.
- You sure you can...
- Yeah, yeah, it's fine.
Whoa, hang on, hang on.
It sticks sometimes.
- What's wrong with this thing?
- That's as far up as it goes.
Oh, it's fine. I was two hours late.
Good start.
Well, tell me about it,
I'm supposed to be sitting on a beach in Cabo.
He said we should see other people,
which is original.
I'm not. I mean, I'm just not.
I couldn't care less.
No, no, it's been about an hour.
Are you kidding? I'm bored to tears.
We're still on the highway
for another five hours.
How should I know?
All the highways look exactly alike.
Hey. What?
Oh, somebody is upset.
Who do you think? My ride.
Careful.
Would you get a look at that face, moody?
What?
If I have to drive, you have to talk to me.
What, I'm the in-flight entertainment?
That's how this ride sharing thing works,
okay?
- Really?
- Division of labor.
- We split everything 50-50.
- Oh, well, I got news for you.
I don't get much more entertaining
than when I'm on the phone.
- So, you're from Wilmington, right?
- Yeah.
Where did you go to school?
St. Vitus Academy.
St. Vitus? I never heard of that.
You're acquainted with every school
in the area?
Pretty much, yeah.
Yeah, well, even the Catholic ones?
'Cause that's where I went to school.
St. Vitus Academy for Catholic boys.
We had a class together, you know.
Intro to modern philosophy.
What? There was like a million people
in that class. It was like Woodstock.
You ever see so many Eastern-religion types?
What's your major?
Eastern Religions.
So, you aren't majoring in philosophy?
No, why?
I don't know, I just assumed that you were...
Oh, yeah, well, try engineering.
I only took philosophy
because I needed a humanities credit
and I heard it was an easy A.
What did you put
for that last question on the final?
Nietzsche's theory of eternal recurrence?
Yeah, like reincarnation, right?
- No, they're actually not the same thing.
- Damn.
Reincarnation is when you come back
as something different
and eternal recurrence is when you live
the same life over and over again.
'The eternal hourglass of existence
is turned over and over, and you with it,
'a grain of dust.'
High school and philosophy,
that pretty much covers everything,
don't you think?
I guess that concludes
the entertainment portion of today's flight.
The next gas station you see,
do me a favor and pull over. I got to pee.
Yeah, okay, I'll keep my eyes peeled.
What?
No, it's that phrase,
keeping your eyes peeled.
I just find it creepy, you know.
Yeah, it is sort of.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Speaking of peeling eyeballs,
did you know that's how they do
that corrective eye surgery?
Yeah, they use a laser.
Yeah, they do,
but there's also peeling involved.
I saw it on Discovery Health.
You know, if more people knew
It's a laser, they use a laser.
I'm having corrective eye surgery
over the break.
- Why? Why do you...
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"Wind Chill" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 26 Feb. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/wind_chill_23512>.