Will Page #4

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Looks like Hatchet Face finally

got herself a boyfriend.

He's not her boyfriend.

He brought my dad's stuff

over from the pub.

Including the tickets?

- Let's see 'em.

- I don't have them.

- Who does?

- Sister Carmel.

What does she care

about football?

She's holding them for me until they

work out who can take me to the match.

The crook's gonna sell

'em and pocket the cash.

Do you think?

There's only one thing worse than a nun.

And that's a thief!

She'll steal your tickets just

like she stole your football!

- But she gave the football back.

- For now.

Doesn't matter anyway.

You're probably right.

The fact is Liverpool

has to win.

And we all know that's

never going to happen.

It comes down to results.

Liverpool loses. you stay.

Liverpool wins... you go.

'It's a '60s, '70s, and

'80s revival night at Anfield.

'The shouting is

about to begin.'

The crying's about to begin.'

'The Liverpool fans belt

out their famous anthem.'

'You'll Never Walk Alone.'

'All they can do is sing their hearts out.

Will their team home.'

'Gerrard with space,

tapped-in towards Bares.'

'He's beaten Cech to it.

Now the goalkeeper made contact.'

'Luis Garcia.

Was it across the line?'

'Goal! Luis Garcia!'

- Bollocks!

- Yes!

'The first goal of the

semi-final is a Liverpool goal.'

'It's Lampard this time. Oh.

Really good save by Dudek.'

'Tossed in towards John Terry.

Dudek comes for it. it's Gudjohnsen...'

'oh. he's missed.'

'That's how close Chelsea

came to the final.'

'All the youngsters on the Kop

will have had to hear all about it'

'from their fathers

and grandfathers.'

'the good old days.

Well they're back.'

'The time has come'

'for Liverpool to play in yet

another European Cup Final.'

'Rome. Wembley. Paris.

Brussels. And now Istanbul.'

- 'May the 25th. it's a date!'

- Can you believe it?

It's just like

your bloody dream.

Lot of good it does me.

If Chelsea were playing in the

finals and I had a ticket.

A seven nation army couldn't

stop me from going.

Me neither.

How am I going to pay for it?

The money you just won

on your dad's bet.

Look. not going is a kick

in the balls to you.

To your father.

And to football fans everywhere.

Hatchet Face doesn't care about this match.

Will, but you have rights.

- That's right. Will.

- I've been reading up on the Magna Carta.

- Know anything about it?

- Oh. I do.

- In 1215 common law was established...

- Shhh!

Way back when some blokes got

together and told King John

that he couldn't go around getting

his jollies however he wanted...

and uh... Simon?

There were legal limits to his whims and diatribes.

Such as Habeas Corpus.

What's that got to do with me?

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