Whoops Apocalypse Page #3

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Penis is the name. Dr Theseus Lyndon Penis.

I accept all major credit cards.

Gentlemen.

The British delegation have had time

to consider our proposals.

They have formulated

their official response?

I'm sure they have, gentlemen.

Is the CIA sure of these facts?

They say the Santa Maya peace talks

were deliberately sabotaged

by this mercenary, Lacrobat,

"to provoke a war in the Caribbean,

and assist a major arms contract

between Maguadora and the American

weapons company Nevada Technics. "

Let's just pray to God

the press doesn't get a hold of this one.

Here is a late newsflash

A top-secret report issued by the CIA

reveals that the Santa Maya peace talks

were sabotaged by the mercenary Lacrobat,

to provoke a war in the Caribbean

and assist a major arms contract

between Maguadora and the American

weapons company Nevada Technics.

Lacrobat is the world's

most wanted terrorist,

and his methods, though bizarre,

are terrifyingly effective.

He's already wanted

for 27 major international crimes,

including six assassinations

and the recipe for airline lunches,

and the news that he's once again at large

in the West is bound to be a cause for concern.

I'll be talking to President Adams

about the Nevada Technics scandal

live on the phone,

from the Oval Office, in just a moment.

This is suicide, Marv.

There's nothing to worry about, madam.

Mr Sweetzer's here.

Fine. Good!

Who the hell's Mr Sweetzer?

Madam, this report claims

Nevada Technics used a hit man, Lacrobat,

to wreck the peace process

in order to grease a major arms deal.

Oh... well,

I wouldn't put too much reliance on that...

And if that's true, Nevada Technics

would have a lot to answer for, wouldn't they?

Oh, well, yes, of course, but...

Madam President, you are, of course,

married to the chairman of Nevada Technics.

Yes... well, as you know...

as you may know...

my husband is away at present

on business in Australia,

and I wouldn't want to pre-empt anything...

OK, Mr Sweetzer.

...no, I don't mean that...

Oh...

Pardon me, madam...

Well, I'm afraid

the... line appears to be breaking up.

We'll get back to that one later on.

Well hell Gerry it's your company

Find out who hired this lunatic

Our press over here

has been worse than the Manson family got

Plus, our protg in the Caribbean

decides to open a new branch of Gestapo Ltd.

in the country next door.

And now the British Prime Minister

is about to play with his toy boats down there,

which presents the West with a small dilemma,

to say the least...

Well, I miss you too, Superman.

Finish your work and hurry home soon. OK?

OK, honey.

Bye-bye for now.

You show them, Sir Mortimer!

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