Wedding Present

Synopsis: Charlie Mason and Rusty Fleming are star reporters on a Chicago tabloid who are romantically involved as well. Although skilled in ferreting out great stories, they often behave in an unprofessional and immature manner. After their shenanigans cause their frustrated city editor to resign, the publisher promotes Charlie to the job, a decision based on the premise that only a slacker would be able crack down on other shirkers and underachievers. His pomposity soon alienates most of his co-workers and causes Rusty to move to New York. Charlie resigns and along with gangster friend Smiles Benson tries to win Rusty back before she marries a stuffy society author.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): Richard Wallace
Production: Paramount Pictures
81 min

Come on, Steve! You're

supposed to be a speed cop.

Let's have some speed. I've

got to get to the Globe Express.

What's the big news, Rusty?

The big news is that I've got

to hurry. I'm late for a wedding.

This is Haley of the Globe Express.

Have you seen Charlie Mason?

No? Well, if you see him, tell him

to rush right over to the office.

Pete Stagg

is having hysterics.

Wait till I get a hold

of that tramp.

Do you want me

to take the assignment?

No. If you can't find Mason, why

doesn't somebody find Rusty Fleming?

My guess is, she's wherever

he is. They're like that.

Like what, darling?

Do you know

where Charlie Mason is?

Yes, I know.

Then what are you

standing there for?

Go get him.

Tell him he's fired.

Tell him to get over to the

St. Andrews' Hotel right away

and get that story

about the Archduke.

Which shall I tell him?

Some day I'll fire him

and you, too!

And this time

you'll stay fired.

You won't get to the front

office to talk your way out of it.

You'll find yourselves

out on the street

with my footprints

all over you.

And if you think I'm talking just

for the sake of hearing myself talk...

She's gone, Mr. Stagg.

Do you solemnly swear

that the statements

contained in this affidavit

are true,

so help you God?

Yes, sir.

$3, please.

Here's your marriage license.


The name is Mason,

Charlie Mason.

I'm sorry I can't

shake hands with you, but...

Where's your affidavit blank?


Yeah, I did have some

kind of a blank, didn't I?

Let me see now. Do you mind?

Thank you. There.

Say, are you crazy?

No, only happy.

Does that look like an

affidavit blank to you?

Now that you mention it,

it doesn't.

No, it doesn't!

Don't be harsh with me.

I'm sensitive.

Go fill out

an affidavit blank,

and get back

to the end of the line.

Oh, be a good fellow and

fill one out for me, will you?

Nothing doing.

The end of the line. Next.

The age of chivalry is dead.

As for you, sir, I thank you. Maybe

we shall meet again in a future life.

If we ever do, I shall be happy

to hold your bundles for you.

I'm much obliged.

Get those bundles

out of here.

What do you think this is? Go

check them in the cloak room.

Such manners. Such manners.


What have you got?

Oh, you nut! Wearing that coat for

a wedding at the County Clerk's.

I like to do things right.

How does it look?

Fine, but you'd better let me

take off the price tag.

What is all this?

Well, fire irons.

What is home

without a fireplace?

And what's a fireplace

without fire irons?

And a vacuum cleaner. You

gotta have a vacuum cleaner.

And rambler roses. You've

always liked rambler roses.

Yes, but climbing up the

side of a house, you goof.

Well, all right,

we have the roses.

All we need

is a side of a house.

Wait a minute,

I'll make a note of it.

Listen, Charlie.

I know that any day

is a total loss to you

unless you pull

at least three gags,

and I love you for it. I

wouldn't have you any other way.


Come on, Rusty, be yourself.

Don't go solemn on a guy just

because you're marrying him.


tomorrow or any other day,

you can ride a white mule

up the City Hall steps

and I'll ride it with you,

but today is different.

I'll spend the rest of my life

with you being crazy,

but let's not have

a crazy wedding day.

Sure, Rusty, sure. You want me to be

serious? All right, I'll be serious.

And the most serious thing in

my life right now is to kiss you.

Wouldn't you think there'd be

a little privacy here?

Hey, you! Keep an eye on

these till we get back.

Oh, let me tender my congratulations.

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Joseph Anthony

Joseph Anthony (May 24, 1912 – January 20, 1993) was an American playwright, actor, and director. He made his film acting debut in the 1934 film Hat, Coat, and Glove and his theatrical acting debut in a 1935 production of Mary of Scotland. On five occasions he was nominated for a Tony Award for Best Direction. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018


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