
Waiting For Guffman
- R
- Year:
- 1996
- 84 min
- 322 Views
First of all,
i want to thank
everybody for coming.
Giving up your lunch hours
and all that.
And, lord knows,
very exciting for all of us.
Happy to be here.
Oh, me, too.
Absolutely. And let's just
I'll be
happy to start.
You know what? Gwen,
why don't you start us off?
Ok. Sure...
you don't need
the pointer here, do you?
No. I don't need
the pointer. Thanks.
I'll just hold on
to it, then.
Oh, she's fine. Gwen?
There is
a concern that i have
that i think
needs addressing
is that we can't have
the port-a-potties
too far off
the main route,
because we do have
a lot of seniors.
Uh, we've solved that.
We're gonna take
the port-a-potties
and put 'em
right over here.
They're not gonna
be in the way.
We're gonna
put a receptacle
over near
arts and crafts.
This is the big bins
you're talking about?
We've got barrels, too.
And we're gonna put
Wait a minute.
That's... that's the crate?
That's the big
barrel, 'cause you got
the pie-eating going on
right over here.
It's more of a dumpster
than a barrel.
That's another thing.
If anything happens
like last year
with that pie-eating...
which brings me
to a point... security.
Oh, god.
Security. I say
we put a rifle on here,
a man with a rifle here,
and a rifle here.
Protect the whole square.
Is that really
necessary?
Yes. Remember how much
we got egged last year?
Absolutely.
What can i tell you?
We're pleased as punch.
We... we are so proud.
We know that
whatever we do here
is a first for blaine
and a first for missouri,
that whatever we do
is going to be the standard
against which all other
sesquicentennials...
that's the 150...
will be judged.
The people of blaine
are can-do people.
In fact, you know, there's
an old saying in missouri
if you don't like the weather,
just wait 5 minutes.
In blaine, i honestly
believe with hard work,
we can get that down
to 3 or 4 minutes.
Here in our
sesquicentennial year,
we've got a lot
to talk about.
There's a lot
to be proud of.
And we're very proud
of it,
that the world
knows more about blaine.
We're chomping at the bit,
certainly from this end,
to get it out there.
It all started
with blaine fabin.
He was hired by 30 settlers
to lead a wagon-train expedition
from philadelphia to california.
Uh, on the 14th night,
word has it they were
sitting around the campfire,
and blaine said,
"do you smell it?
Do you smell the salt
in the air?"
He said, "we're here.
I brought you to california."
And so there was
a big party that night.
And the next morning,
they got up. Uh...
they didn't see the ocean
because they were in missouri.
Uh, blaine was able to convince
them for a little while
that it was just low tide
and things,
but what had happened was
that he had made some mistakes.
Bad weather. Wasrt familiar,
perhaps, with the proper route.
But as it turns out,
everybody was quite happy
to be where they were.
So they said, "it's ok we didn't
make it to california.
We'll stay here."
And that's why
i'm at this desk.
Well, i'm very proud to say
that i'm a direct descendant
of blaine fabin.
I've lived here all my life.
As did my parents
and their parents
and their parents
and their parents
and so on and so forth.
I'm very excited about
the show coming up,
because it'll be
the first time
i'll have the experience
of sitting in the audience
my ancestor...
the... the actual
blaine fabin.
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"Waiting For Guffman" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2019. Web. 14 Dec. 2019. <https://www.scripts.com/script/waiting_for_guffman_22984>.