
Waiting...
Ha, ha, ha.
Home sweet home.
Thanks, Cochise.
No, you fucking idiot! I've worked
at a restaurant my whole life.
Shit! It gonna be
that kind of a party,
in the mashed potatoes!
- Guess who. Hi, Dean. It's Mom.
- Ah, shit.
I know you're not gonna
forget lunch with me,
but I thought I'd call
just to make sure.
Oh, hey.
I forgot you were here.
Yeah, I know. I know.
- What?
- Nothing.
I'll see you at work, okay?
Hey, there, Natasha.
How's my favorite minor doing today?
Hung over.
I got so shitty last night.
On a schooI night?
Kids today.
I must say, there's nothing more attractive
than tainted youth.
Yes. I am indeed a pervert.
- Does that offend you?
- Nope.
I think that most tainted youths
end up being perverts.
Good answer.
Oh, and Monty,
just so you know,
I'm only a minor
for another week.
I turn 18 on Wednesday.
Well, then I guess I better hurry up then.
I don't have much time.
- Hey, Dan.
- Hey, Monty.
- How you doing?
- Good. This is Mitch. It's his first day.
I want you to show him around.
Train him on everything while it's slow,
and when the dinner rush hits,
we'll have him watch the training videos.
Mitch, just listen to
what Monty says today,
and we'll have you out
on the floor by early next week.
- Sound good?
- Yeah.
All right then. Give him a quick tour
before your shift starts.
Good stuff.
Well, Mitch, first thing.
You ever worked in a restaurant before?
- Actually, yeah-
- Well, it doesn't really matter anyway.
Working in a restaurant's
Everything that Dan wants me
to show you, teach you,
all that can be learned
in a few hours.
But...
if you wanna work here,
in this restaurant,
you need to ask yourself
one simple question.
How do you feeI about
frontaI male nudity?
- What the heck-
You see, the reason that I ask
is most of the guys that work here
like to play this little game that involves
flashing their genitalia to each other.
- Are you serious?
- Yes, I'm serious.
Now, the exact object
of the game
is to get the other participants to unknowingly
look at your testicles and/or penis.
And if they do, you ridicule them
mercilessly for being a fag
and get to kick them
in the ass.
- But that's-
- I know. I know.
It's demented, depraved,
senseless.
All true.
Now there are rules to the game-
different variations on how to show your dick
and/or balls which allow for more kicks.
But we're gonna get
into that later.
Right now, the first thing
that you have to do
is look deep inside yourself and figure out
if you can take an eyefuI of that.
So are you taking any interesting classes
this semester?
Well, yeah.
I'm only taking the two classes,
but I like 'em both.
I really like my teachers.
CooI guys.
Both have mustaches,
which is a little weird.
- Well, that's just terrific.
- Yeah.
- Guess who I ran into yesterday?
- Who's that?
Nancy Miller and her son Chet.
You remember Chet Miller, don't you?
Oh, yeah.
I remember Chet. Yeah.
- I haven't seen that guy since high schooI.
- Well, he was away at college.
Right.
Didn't you two have all the same
honors classes together?
Yeah, we sure did.
- Yeah, it sounds like he's doing really well.
- I'll bet.
Seems he just graduated with
a bachelor's degree in electricaI engineering.
Wow. His parents must
really be proud, huh?
Well, I'm gonna go.
Always love these get-togethers.
I think we really
broke through there.
Let me tell you something.
My trainer, that bastard,
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"Waiting..." Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 5 Mar. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/waiting..._22988>.