Vigilante Diaries Page #3

You know, he's just one of those

connected dudes.

I didn't know if he was C.I.A.

or worked for the Apple Store,

but he just knows sh*t.

I guarantee he knows

some Call of Duty-type dudes.

I'll send someone over now.

- Who?

- Don't worry about it.

- The less you know, the better.

- Okay, as long as the dude is cool,

he'll be fine, all right?

Barry's a little weird.

- Weird?

- Eccentric.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(SINGING IN SPANISH)

There's someone here for Barry!

Barry!

You interrupted my swim lesson.

This is Jake.

He's my swim coach.

Jake, go in the house.

Wipe that oil off

before you sit on the couch.

Okay '.

Bro, you know why the f*** I'm here.

You gonna help me or not?

I would help you

if you'd learn some manners.

You can't just walk around

like you're Baby Blade

and break into people's homes.

What's up with Generation Me?

None of you guys

give a sh*t about anything.

- You gonna help me or not?

- Okay, I'll help you.

But first, Marta,

get him

a sugar-free Red Bull.

Oh, my... (SPEAKS SPANISH)

Really?

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

He's not here to f*** me.

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

Half of what you said

is not in my Rosetta Stone.

(SPEAKS SPANISH, LAUGHS)

It's kind of...

It's almost like an arranged thing.

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

Let's just go in the house.

Marta!

I want my f***ing burrito

after my meeting.

So, Vigilante, huh?

I like his work.

Actually, when Mike called me,

I got a boner for it.

Didn't say you'd be coming, though.

Yeah, Jade likes

lo keep us separate.

- Safer that way.

- Yeah, smart girl.

So, how did it work?

Were you in

the Big Brother program,

and Vigilante just walks in and says,

"I'll take the black one"?

- F*** you.

- Touchy, are we?

- What is all this'!

- Every tactical op in the state...

F.B.I., C.I.A., A.T.F.,

some-even some chatter

from local terrorist cells, loo.

I just monitor it,

look for patterns.

For what?

Hey, just because I don't get up

at dawn anymore and do pushups

doesn't mean

I don't love my country.

- You ever heard of SEAL Team Six'?

- You were a SEAL?

Yeah, I was a SEAL.

"Don't ask, don't tell,"

it's f***ing bullshit.

Besides, I'm still doing my part

to keep a**holes like you safe.

Oh, here it is.

Okay, now the last thing

we got from Mike

has your boy right here

just south of the border in Mexico.

I know the perfect guys for this.

Ex-Blackwater studs,

bored and badass.

- They'll do this.

- How you know they'll do it'?

Trust me.

They'll do it.

- Marta!

- What?

- Get the car!

- Oh, no, no, no.

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

I can't get a divorce.

It's par! of my cover.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Straight savage,

the boy revs macho

See me stackin' chips,

say cheese, no nachos

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