Vampires Page #4

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the wrong motherf***er!

Go ahead and kill me!

I dont know what you`rre talking about!

I dont.

Well see.

Where are we going?

You have to tell me whats going on.

- Have you ever seen a vampire?

- No.

First of alI, theyre not romantic.

Its not like they`rre a bunch of fags

hopping around in rented formal wear...

seducing everybody in sight

with cheesy Euro-trash accents.

Forget whatever youve seen in movies.

They dont turn into bats.

Crosses don`tt work.

You want to try garlic?

Stand with garlic around your neck...

one of these buggers will bend you over

and take a walk...

up your strada chocolatta while hes

sucking blood from your neck, all right?

And they dont sleep in coffins

lined in taffeta.

You want to kill one, you drive

a wooden stake right through his heart.

Sunlight turns them

into crispy critters.

Got it?

See this map?

This map shows all the encounters

in the United States...

as far back as the 1800s.

- Ive never seen this.

- No one has outside the team.

Look at the southwest.

See the spiral pattern?

If you time sequence all the encounters,

you get a logarithmic pattern...

ever widening.

Its a search pattern, Padre.

They`rre looking for something.

Do you know what it is?

I heard stories when I was young.

Something about a black cross.

About vampires walking in the sunlight.

Padre, can I ask you something?

Yeah.

When I was kicking your ass back there,

did that give you wood?

What?

Did you get a mahogany from that?

Tell the truth.

Im just f***ing with you.

Forget about it.

Oh, Jesus.

What time is it?

You want one?

Youve got to eat something.

I cant.

I wouldnt mind a cigarette, though.

We need to work on this.

The less you eat, the faster the virus

moves through your bloodstream.

Virus?

Yeah. Thats what I call it.

Nobody knows what it really is.

Poison, Kool-Aid, whatever,

it all does the same thing.

Turns you into a vampire.

What happened to the other girls

at the party?

They didnt make it.

Im sorry.

You remember now?

Some.

Why doesnt anyone know?

Nobody wants to know.

Thats how vampires survive.

They`rre smart.

They keep their numbers low, live in

small bands. The world never catches on.

Will I end up being one?

I dont know for sure.

Probably.

Unless we find him before you turn.

Then maybe theres a chance.

Look, heres what we do know.

Youre connected

to the master vampire now.

Hes a part of you,

and this link will grow.

Youll never be able to get him

out of you, not while he exists.

Then I dont want to live.

You may not.

Can I get dressed now?

Sure.

Could you get me a towel or something?

Its not like I haven`tt seen you naked.

F*** it.

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